ELLENWatch

Saturday, September 15, 2012

"FOOEY time"

Self-portrait of the blogger, finally putting it down

By popular demand, here is the late post from Wednesday night that escaped my notice. "Popular demand," by the way, is coming from the shadowy ranks of commenters who (aptly) find their home here. The closest they have come to fighting words:

It's FOOEY time for you, Ellenwatch! Another missed post! FOOEY and Ptooey or whatever!

Thanks for the link, Anonymous! But for the first time, I need to throw down. I feel comfortable doing so because this is MY blog. You ready?

IS THERE ANYBODY OUT THERE WHO THINK'S THEY CAN ELLENWATCH BETTER THAN ELLENWATCH???? LET'S SEE IT!!!!! OTHERWISE TAKE A SEET BECAUSE IT IS NOT FOOEY TIME FOR ME UNTIL I SAY SO!!!!!

Ahem.

Ellen September 12, 2012 at 9:27 pm

I JUST finished up for the Day and am goeing home! Yay! I cannot beleive I am workeing SO hard and am NOT GETTING ANY HELP!!! FOOEY!

I just finish workeing up my do diliegence outline under the Robenson Packman Act. It is VERY INTENSE and I never took Trade Regulation as a 3L. I was dumb to take legal medicine. But it does Help me a little in my WC CASES. Yay!

It is to late for a meal when i get home so I will just eat a box of Triskets with Soy milk!!!! Yay!!!!

"LOOK HERE EVERY DAY"

Look's like I've been absolved by the Sunshine Girls. Last time I heard from this anonymous ELLENWatcher, I was thoroughly dressed down for getting behind on posts that showed up late. Now she's back, weighing in on the last bone we were thrown but also enthusiastically indicating that my daily performance is back up to snuff:

This is intriguing as we know now her sexual experience is limited. But as she has been sullied by Alan and is no longer virginal as a result, this can explain why she still clings to the memory of what can only be described as a drunk loser. I therefore believe her. She will not again have sex with a man without a ring. All 5 of us at S&S LOOK HERE EVERY DAY for Ellenisms, so keep up the good work! We have many bald MP types with equally disgusting habits!

Obviously I'm not going to get cocky here. I know S&S have high standards, and I am bound to disappoint again. But I appreciate the positive feedback along with the negative, and look forward to a handle from this commenter, as well as a roster for S&S. Here's my working draft:

Lourine

France's

Jill

Belinda G.

Eva Aline

And any of these loyal employees/sunshine girls could be posting as S&S Associate, since apparently that's what they all are.

Am I all wet, Anonymous? You at least owe me that much...

IRREGARDELESS of what we have done before in the bedroom

Another almost sane, almost reasonable comment. The takeaway here for me is that Alan was Ellen's FIRST. That had not been my impression. (And it may not be true. But it is a new claim.)

Ellen September 15, 2012 at 9:08 am

The ARTICLE is judgemeneteal about others that do have sex before marrage, but dont get to worked up about them. It will be intereesteing to see if this couple stay’s together as long as they think.

When I was in college there was a Senior guy, John, that alway’s said he would NEVER have sex with a woman before marrage, and that he would NEVER marry any woman who had sex before thier wedding night. So he meet’s a blond freshman Marjorie, who was right off a farm in IOWA (Or Idaho, I forget), and he start’s dateing her. When he gradueated, he MARRIED Marjorie (suposedly they were virgin’s).

Less then 2 year’s later, they get divorced. So that marrage did NOT work out, and I am sorry about that. Fooey. It work’s sometimes and sometimes it does NOT. There is NO single rule that applies to every one when it comes to sex.

I am NOT advoceating having sex or NOT haveing sex before marrage, b/c there is no one right answer. I do NOT have that alterneative anymore b/c of my own history with Alan, but I onley hope that the man I eventueally MARRY will care for me the way I will care for him, and this will be true IRREGARDELESS of what we have done before in the bedroom with other’s before.

I do think it is importent NOT to just have sex willie nilley when you meet a guy, because it is more special then just going out for an ice cream cone. But it is NOT right to condem a man or a woman b/c they have had sex before. That is stupid, so to that extent, I agree that the article is dumb.

Friday, September 14, 2012

In re DELLI

Ellen's professional competence and weight are both going in the wrong direction.

Ellen September 14, 2012 at 5:03 pm

This is the storey of my LIFE! I am admitted to the BAR in NY and have alot of expierence, but I still have to do alot of word proecesssing of my cases MYSELF, and ONLEY when I am done do I give it to the secretary for formatteing and finalizing! Can you imagine? I do the typeing work on all of the document’s FIRST, then give it to the SECRETARY! OMG! FOOEY on that!!!

If it make’s you feel any better, I also do all of the copeying, and collateing of document’s, and I even prepare the FEDEX lables while she sit’s back and attend’s to the other partner all the time. FOOEY on that also.

So when there was an Assistant’s day in April, guess what? I took MYSELF out for DELLI! Yay!!!!

In re DELLI, I had it again today! My tuchus is getting so big now just thinkeing about the corn beef I got when Jim brought it over. It was NOT from Pastrami Queen however. He did NOT want to go uptown even though it is MY fave. He got it from some place I do not know on 46th Street. It was NOT that great. The corn beef was dry and they did NOT have good pickels. FOOEY! Anyway, we went over some of the diliegience material and he gave me a checklist he wanted me to follow when we go on site. I told him I was developeing my OWN checklist, but he did NOT like what I showed him. I spent 3 hour’s developeing that checklist, and the manageing partner told me that I could NOT bill for it. FOOEY. I do not know why I am workeing for nothing.

Jim said that he knows of a place near the hotel we will be staying at that has Southern Barbaquuue. I do NOT like that, but he said we should try it. We shall see. I may wind up eateing COBB salad now that I am 11 lbs overweight. FOOEY!

YOUR’S TRUELY

Is Ellen getting extra specific about practiceing in NY to try to disprove the doubters? Again, I have searched the NY bar directory and there is NO Ellen Barshevsky or anything like.
Again we see "Yay!" where one would expect "Fooey!" Ellen really isn't sophisticated enough a writer to have ever employed sarcasm, but since this is the second time I am confused. I guess my typographical and philosophical questions about this are still the same...

Ellen September 14, 2012 at 10:29 am

While I do love this shirt for casueal wear, but I absoutleley can NOT wear this at work b/c it is to tightly tailored and and the manageing partner would be calleing me into his office and be stareing at my body which I do NOT like at all. Fooey on that! Beside’s he has his OWN wife to look at, not me. And Frank is no better. He also make’s sexeual coments which I try to defer by talkeing about other issues.

Anyway, today Jim is coming by the office to discuss billeing for August with the manageing partner. I wonder if he is goeing to complain about Frank and not get charged for Frank’s billeing on the HSR. As it was, I had to cut off alot of hours and NOT bill, even tho I was busy geting up to speed on HSR and ANTI-TRUST, which will help me with the do diliegence in a couple of week’s. If I get any more hour’s chopped off by the manageing partner, I will have to work all weekend doing more “research” on my WC cases that I realy do NOT need to do, but will HAVE to b/c of the billeing requirement’s that the manageing partner INSISTS I do. FOOEY!!!

It is not easy bieng a PROFESSIONAL attorney admitted to the Bar in NY State. I also have to be 100% etheical b/c I have to certify to this every 2 years with the STATE and take CLE’s.

The manageing partner is makeing me prepare his CLE outline which HE is giving to the Bar Association in November, and HE will get 3x the CLE credit for being the instructor, while YOUR’S TRUELY does all the work. What is THAT all about? All I get to do is go and listen to him at the CLE. Big deal. Yay!!!

Thursday, September 13, 2012

some kind of workearound

Fascinating how Ellen returns to certain touchstones in her narrative. The Fordham University School of Law is one of these, my friends. I don't expect anyone to remember LARRY, especially since there's been more than one, but he, too, was an alum.
The important event in MP's family is apparently drawing nearer, with pressure to attend with Harold mounting. If we take Ellen's word for it that this recent college grad has already lost much of his hair, does that mean we can assume he's the MP's sister's son? (My thinking: male-pattern baldness is inherited from the mother.)

Ellen September 13, 2012 at 2:45 pm

It is TO big for me. I would put alot of stuff in it and it would be to heavy for me with all of the stuff I put IN it. Also, it is exepensive, and the manageing partner will NOT reimemburse me for it b/c it is NOT clotheing (acording to him) — FOOEY on his rule’s!

Anyway, I now have to do some kind of workearound to juggle the do dilegeince trip and my calendar call at the end of the month. The manageing partner does NOT want to do calendar call b/c he does NOT like the judge, and the judge does not like him that much either. Both are FORDAM grad’s and they both think that they are smarter then each other.

Now Harold came by the offiece and was talkeing with the manageing partner about the party. I am almost expecteing the manageing partner to DICTATE that I come with Harold, b/c he live’s near me and has access to a car. I agree it will be easier to DRIVE then to take a LIRR train and cab, but I will have to SIT with Harold for 2-3 HOURS! FOOEY! What could I talke with him about for 2-3 hours?

Harold was stareing at me with the manageing partner, and I am SURE he will also be bald in a few year’s!!!!!

Help!

I LOVE THIS BABY!!!!!

I'm sure Kat was waiting for Ellen, as virtual godmother, to bless her son. The way it is expressed here really warm's my heart too.
Ellen's vision of her future family and home life, as well as obstacles thereto, remain the same.
Meanwhile, MP always seems to be coming up with new stimuli for his bald head. Snotty handkerchief, FUNKY smelling lunch bag, and now this.

Ellen September 13, 2012 at 11:37 am

THIS WAS MY thinkeing to!!!!! I LOVE THIS BABY!!!!! YAY!!!!!!

I want to have a baby, but I must FIRST be married. LOGISTIECEALLY, this is dificult, b/c I do NOT even have a decent boyfreind. Most guy’s do NOT want a releationship leading to MARRIAGE, but instead just want to “HANG OUT”. FOOEY!

That is NOT what I want or NEED at this point in my life. I want a guy who will be there for ME when I need him to be there, and to be a father to our children. I want to live in the subburb’s in a NICE house, and take our kid’s to school, and mabye work part time as a JUDGE or as general council to a small place that I could do that mabye 12-20 hours a week.

It does NOT seem like that is going to hapen any time soon, since I am workeing 65 hour’s a week on all of this litiegation and now the do diligeance stuff. FOOEY!

I guess I can think about it, as the manageing partner is busy stareing at me and scratcheing his bald head with his ruler! FOOEY!