Tuesday, April 29, 2014

if we all carry ourselves with the dignity of Ellen Barshevsky.

You didn't think I would skip this one, did you? Ellen herself may not have wayed in on this past weekend's discussion about discussion, but a number of loyal fans brought her in in spirit. Entirely fitting, say I. Firstly, while many things may have changed on Corporette over the years, Ellen assuredly has not. Secondly, I agree that she is unmatched if you're looking for a bright, cheery tone and consistent life goals (for looseing weight and getting pregnant, if not in her career). 

I was a bit surprised to see such support from cbackson, who is an unerringly real person. All the more welcome, though!

Kelley B :
I think the site is fine. And I also really like that people are humble. And the best is Ellen Barshevsky, who always says things with a smile, even though she has issues with her boss, men and living in NY City.
We all need to take a step back and not get so stuck on ourselves. It probably would be a good thing if we all carry ourselves with the dignity of Ellen Barshevsky. Where is she when we need her views on this thread?
  • I love Ellen. She is very down to earth and not afraid to share her feelings. I hope she finds a husband soon. She probably will be a great mom. I’d set her up with my brother but he’s too much of a player for her.
cbackson :
It’s funny, but in a weird way I truly do feel like Ellen is the soul of this site. For all of her…Ellen-ness, in the end, she’s just a young woman trying to find career success and a guy who loves her for her (even with her ample tuchus!). Ellen doesn’t take disrespect from men, she cares about her community, and she has real, meaningful friendships with her female friends. IDK, I kind of feel like I know her…even though she isn’t real.
Here’s to you, Ellen Barshevsky.
  • I second the motion. Ellen is clearly a gem, and she is our gem. As far as I can tell, she is not posting on the ABA bulletin board any more — instead, she has grown up from a brash law student into a young lady who is achieving fame and fortune in her own small world of workers compensation, and keeping us up to speed with her personal life here, rather than with the ABA. I agree she should find a man, have children and return to the life of her childhood, being like her own mom baking cookies and cakes, and slipping them to her own issue much like her mom does for her. Go Ellen!
  • Pandoraphile :
    I third the motion! Ellen is a great distraction from work because many of us have the same kind of jerks in our office. Personally, I also have a manager who is quirky, and a co-worker with digestive issues that results in a host of excess gas within the office (though no bathroom/toilet in the center of the office that he sits in all day). And needless to say, we all have had issues with our admin assistants (a/k/a secretaries) who can be very helpful at times and very useless at others.
    So I look forward to Ellen’s daily posts, even if Corporette does not have a spell-check function for her! Keep up the great work, Ellen!!!!!!!!!


  1. What I will never understand is why Ellenwatch has all of a sudden go on hiatus and has elected to post only sporadically?

    We lose the flow when we get only sporadic commentary, however prescient it may be, so I think me, one of the other gals, Gauss, January or one the others on this site must fill in the gaps, unless Ellenwatch gives it up (as she has her maidenhood) to someone who sweettalks her into doing so. For the moment, however, here's a couple for the rest of us (and Vinnie):

    Ellen :
    04/30/2014 at 3:32 pm

    Yay! You are like me (tho I never did work for Big Law). You should know, if you interview in small-law, that the work is the same. We ALL must do work, and the difference is here, YOU must do alot that you did NOT do before. You MUST do alot of typing–I do all of my own Pleeding’s and letters, and efficeintley through copying and pasteing from other document’s. The manageing partner think’s I am a wizard b/c he does NOT do any word processing and does NOT even know about copying and pasteing!

    That is why I am abel (and you should be abel ) to bill alot for cases even if all you do is change a coupel of name’s and date’s. How else can I get to 6600 hour’s this year? YAY!!!

    Rosa said that she is thinkeing of lookeing of buying a place with Ed in the Hamton’s!!!! If she doe’s that I have a place to stay and would NOT have to share with other girl’s who alway’s bring back guys to the house. I am so tired of walkeing in on them when they are haveing sex or just drinkeing with these guys so that they will have sex later with them! FOOEY! It is so boreing to see the same thing’s over and over, but worse b/c they want priveacy to do stuff (which I do NOT disagree with). It is just that if I am renteing a place, I do NOT want to have to sneak thru my own liveing room, or hear all of the huffeing and puffeing and moaneing and groaneing that goe’s on in the liveing room b/c we share a bedroom. FOOEY! Also, the guy’s make a mess, then just leave, and I wind up cleaning the living room and some time’s it is gross! DOUBEL FOOEY!

    So best of luck to the OP, and rembemer if you go to the Hamton’s, share onley with women who promise NOT to bring back guy’s for sex while you are tryeing to sleep. YAY!!!!

  2. Ellen :
    04/30/2014 at 1:38 pm

    I agree with this! When I get MARRIED, which I hope is VERY soon, I will have everything transfered from my dad’s power of attorney into mine and my HUSBAND’s in Joint account. Even if it is joint account, my dad wants HIM to handel all that stuff so that I can just focus my attention on our marrage and our children and my job as long as I keep it. Right now dad is doeing all this stuff and he says he is tired of being my “husband”. So I told him that I will make sure my husband is as smart as he is, but so far, the looser’s I have tried to marry do NOT measure UP to him and therefore I am still NOT married even tho I do have a good job and an apartement that dad handel’s for me and a broekearage account at Merrill Lynch (through Ed) and some other stuff that dad has for me that he manage’s in MY name.

    The IRS guy keep’s texteing me but I am worried that he could NOT suport me and he want’s to live in DC. I was there for many year’s and even tho it is pretty there now, it get’s VERY hot in the summer, but NOT in a nice way. I do NOT like to sweat to much so DC is not the place for me. FOOEY! Mabye if he lived in NYC and had a better job, mabye with a big accounting firm or a law firm makeing more money, I might consider that but I do NOT want to work after I am MARRIED. FOOEY on that! I did NOT go to law school, study hard, take and maintain my status as a member of the Bar of the State of New York in good standing just to WORK. DOUBEL FOOEY! I want to get MARRIED NOW while my body can handel children. Where in the world is my prince? All I meet now are differnt speceis of Frog’s, some from the European Union even! TRIPEL FOOEY!

  3. Now this would have been helpful to have an Ellenwatch comment. Of course she was either asleep or doing something unprintable when this came out.

    Ellen :
    04/30/2014 at 11:47 am

    Yay! Fineally a question that I can help with!!!

    My dad say’s co-ops are cheeper then condo’s but you only own stock, not the apartement itself. But it does NOT make that much diference b/c you are responsible for the apartement, if you want to paint it, you have to do it yourself, tho the coop will have a guy up if there is a probelem with the electric, but NOT the air conditioning unit (which YOU own).

    My dad says whatever the apartement is, that is what you get. So when I told him what I wanted, he did alot of lookeing and most of the apartement’s I liked that he picked out were coop’s, tho 1 was not. I had to get approved by the board of director’s which are just silly peeople in the building that really have nothing better to do all day then boss the rest of us around and buy flower’s for the lobby and write nasty newsletter’s telling us that we have to be quieter on the pool /exercise floor b/c there are peeople living there, etc.

    The president of my coop said that I was getting approved ONLEY b/c my dad guaranteed my morgage or whatever, and he thought I might be troubel b/c I was a lawyer!! I said I am NOT a coop lawyer so I would NOT be troubel. The other lady sitting there (I do NOT even think she EVER took the skowl off her face) asked me if I would be bringeing MEN into the apartement. I said I had freind’s and I hoped I could without askeing HER permission! She also wanted to make sure I did NOT cook smelley food. FOOEY on her. I think she was just jelous of me b/c I was still in my 20′s and already had a job and a law degree and was dateing Alan Sheketovits. Even after I was aproved, and moved in, I warned Alan NOT to cause any troubel b/c of the skowleing lady who lives on my floor! DOUBEL FOOEY if you have someone on the board on your floor.

    I am still in Pitsuburgh, and the weather is NOT very nice here. I hope to get back by Friday so I can go to CRUMBS. YAY!!!!!

  4. Ellen giving good advice to a younger 'rette!

    Ellen :
    04/29/2014 at 11:20 am

    Yay! This is a beautiful Cardican, Kat! I want one for ME even if the manageing partner say’s no, but I think its’ OK for reimburesement. I will show ROSA b/c she will look so cute in this one also!

    As for the OP, do not worry about the interview. You will do FINE! When I was interviewing in college, I had one of these, and it is actueally easier b/c the guy will NOT be abel to stare at you, so you will have less to be concerned about. At some interview’s guys will stare at my boobie’s and I find that VERY annoyeing, to say the least. They need to look at your eye’s, but they dont or if they do, their eye’s drift down to our boobie’s and when we leave, they stare at our tuchuses. I realy do NOT know what their probelem’s are, but I do NOT think stareing at our boobie’s and tuchuses will solve them! FOOEY!

    Mom and I will be heading out shoppeing soon, so everyone have a great day! I might not be abel to post this afternoon b/c I am going to Target too, just in case they do not have the $16 necklace up in Harlem when I get back to NYC. YAY!!!!!!
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    Blue Anne :
    04/29/2014 at 12:27 pm

    I’m weirdly flattered that I got an Ellen post.
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  5. This one's a classic! Ellen weighs in first, with a correct response. The others later acknowledge her speediness and accurateness in giving tax advice. Who knew that she could be so helpful. Ellenwatch, are you Ellen? Or are you that close to being uncovered? Spill, please!


    hoola hoopa :
    04/28/2014 at 2:52 pm

    This is the kind of necklace that I always seem to need to complete an outfit but never buy. hmm…

    Tax question:

    2014 is the first year my husband is working 100% on contract. He has previously done very small amounts on contract but been primarily on salary. We have been putting aside our historic tax rate into a savings account in preparation for tax filing, but someone (not expert) told him that he’ll be fined if he does not pay taxes quarterly. Is that true?

    He’s not an LLC, self-employed, etc. He’s working for the same firm as he has for years as a salaried employing, but now is working for them as a contract employee.

    We’ve done some research ourselves and couldn’t see that was true, but we’re unsure of ourselves. I know there are some tax experts here, so I’m hoping someone can confirm or deny that we need to be paying his income tax quarterly instead of annually. Thanks!
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    Ellen :
    04/28/2014 at 2:56 pm

    Yes, you need to pay estimated taxe’s unless his pay is getting witheld, which if he is an independent contractor, it is NOT, since he is NOT an employee. There is a form for this. 1040-ES. Read this. The IRS guy that wanted to date me just texted me this. YAY!!
    Reply Report
    Anonymous :
    04/28/2014 at 3:21 pm

    Wow – I’m kinda amazed that Ellen has moved towards providing legit advice and answers.
    Reply Report
    HSAL :
    04/28/2014 at 3:35 pm

    She’s probably excited about all the positive talk she got during the weekend thread.
    Reply Report
    Diana Barry :
    04/28/2014 at 3:37 pm

    Ditto! OP, you need to file and pay estimated tax, just as ELLEN says. :)
    Reply Report
    Bonnie :
    04/28/2014 at 4:59 pm

    Never thought we’d get legitimate advice from Ellen.
    Reply Report
    Ashley :
    04/28/2014 at 10:41 pm

    I have read some good advice from Ellen in the past.

    This is a whole new level, but still, her heart is in the right place.
    Reply Report
    ZBK :
    04/28/2014 at 5:49 pm

    Wow, both brilliant and beautiful! Who knew all that came in one package! Once the tuchis is taken care of she will be unstoppable!
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    Anonymous :
    04/28/2014 at 3:17 pm

    He is a self-employed independent contractor and owes estimated tax quarterly. Listen to Ellen for she is wise.
    Reply Report

    hoola hoopa :
    04/28/2014 at 5:59 pm

    …So, thank you Ellen? That feels weird to say.

    Thank you all! I knew you ladies would have the correct information and links.
    Reply Report

  6. Here it seems Ellen has met men in Pittsburgh with beards that she does not approve of. Others counsel her that it is because they are hockey fans. Perhaps a budding romance with an out-of-state jock may be in the works?

    Ellen :
    04/28/2014 at 2:53 pm

    Kat, you are SO right and so styleish for pointeing this out for us! There is a Target near us here in Pitsburgh! I think I will go right over and get one! Yay! I hope there is one left for me b/c it is onley $16 YAY!!!!!

    I got a call from Sam. I thought he would have found another person but he say’s I am “TOP SHELF”. I am not sure what that mean’s but he seem’s very anxius to get together with me when I get back to NYC. He said he is afraid he will LOOSE me here to some other guy in Pitsburgh. I doubt it. So many guy’s have beard’s that I thought I was in the HOLY land! FOOEY! We are to meet at 2nd Ave deli when I get back! DOUBEL YAY!!!!
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    Brit :
    04/28/2014 at 3:23 pm

    Ellen, so many have beards because our beloved Pens are in the playoffs. A playoff beard is a sign of true team love – you should try to snag a good ‘burgh guy while you’re here!
    Reply Report
    TO Lawyer :
    04/28/2014 at 3:29 pm

    Hockey fans are good catches ;)
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    Anon99 :
    04/29/2014 at 8:37 am

    Ellen is not actually in Pittsburgh – there is no deli on 2nd Ave. Cover Blown.
    Reply Report
    ExecAssist :
    04/29/2014 at 9:17 am

    She said when she gets back to NYC. Why am I participating in this? Lol.
    Reply Report

  7. Ellen :
    04/28/2014 at 2:03 pm

    Yay! I just arrived in Pitsburgh! We are late getting here. FOOEY! As for the OP, I agree that you can fix the pencil skirt, but you proabbaly have the same issue’s with your TUCHUS that I do. My tuchus and pencil skirt’s do not mix b/c my body is not thin like a pencil. I need loose fit’s for now until I get my tuchus under control and can fit back in my size 2′s. Mom want’s to stay all week, but I have to much to do to stay that long. FOOEY b/c the weather is not to bad! I miss the city already and hope the HIVE had a good weekend. YAY!!!!!

  8. Ellen :
    04/25/2014 at 10:11 am

    Yay! Fruegel Friday! I love Fruegel Friday’s and this high cut blouse! I wonder if I can wear a pencil skirt with it? It seems way to loose for that. What does the HIVE think?

    As for the OP, I would love to join a fitbit group on this sight, b/c I use it every day. We can compare notes and tuchuses before and after every week, just like dad does with me. He chart’s my progress (or lack therof) on his computer and make’s sure to tell me that I need to loose more weight. The ONLEY thing the fitbit does NOT do is to measure my tuchus specificeally. YAY! Because if dad knew that my tuchus is the same size, I would never hear the end of it every night when I call.

    Dad expleains — and he is right — that he married mom b/c she was a great cook, and that her tuchus was NOT a factor b/c of that. In my case, he explained — and I agree– that I am NOT a good cook, and as a result, I have to have a small tuchus to get a man to marry me. The onley exception is if I become a good cook first, and I think I will loose weight b/f I learn to cook well. My wedding chicken was a disaster, and I have NOT done much real cookeing since, unless you consider warmeing up prepared food from Eli’s and Fairway’s. Dad does NOT so he tells me, EVERY NITE, that my tuchus size has to go down before a man will be interested enough to marry me. Sleep with me, yes, but NOT marry me. He say’s I need a tuchus like Myrna. He does NOT care that Myrna is not married, but he says she WOULD be married in an instant if she found a decent guy. Mom is coming into town this weekend and I am takeing off Monday and Tuesday to travel with her (by train) to see her Aunt in Pitsburgh. I saw her last when I was in Pitsburgh to do some EBTs. She is younger then Grandma Trudy, but she is not to well. I said that Pitsburgh was NOT great, except for Schrunchie’s, which I will restock b/c my cousin’s took alot of mine.

    Anyway, I wish all of the HIVE a great weekend. I will try to post with my MacBook Air b/c the manageing partner needs for me to stay in touch. I told him I would if I have WIFI, even tho I can conect with my Iphone also, it is hard to read busness stuff on it. FOOEY!
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    Lauretta :
    04/25/2014 at 2:08 pm

    Bring back a schrunchie for me! Yay!
    Reply Report

  9. Ellen :
    04/24/2014 at 3:40 pm

    I love this scarf, and MUST show ROSA b/c she can get it at NORDSTROM’s in White Plain’s!!!! Mabye she can buy two and we can be twins! YAY!!!!! I am not sure if the manageing partner will reimburse me for a scarf–technicaly it is NOT clotheing and I do NOT wear it to court, but I think I will argue that I need to wear this TO court and that if I get sick, I will NOT be abel to speak as effetivly IN court and the JUDGE will not be abel to hear my voice — therefoere I should be abel to get REIMBURSED for the scarf!

    If anyone in the hive can help me with another better arguement, I am all ear’s!!!!! YAY!!!

    In the mean time, Mason has been giveing me dirty look’s today. I think some of the thing’s I told Lynn must have stuck in her mind and mabye she is not beeing treated like such a dishrag by him, or some thing else is going down that I do NOT know about. Mabye I am to sensitive, but I think she may be standeing up to some of his demand’s and askeing for more in return. What else could it be? Well we women HAVE to stick up for ourselves, or guy’s will just burp and walk away. FOOEY on that! Especially since she is sleepeing with him every nite, he is probabley getting alot more then he deserves. FOOEY!
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    Gauss :
    04/24/2014 at 7:06 pm

    Your logical arguments are impeccable as always. I’m sure the managing partner will decide to reimburse you for the scarf!
    Reply Report

  10. Ellen and the toilet issue with Frank (again). He must really drop a pretty smelly load for Ellen to comment on it so regularly! Ellenwatch, isn't this really your story with your gaseous significant other's "poopie"?

    Ellen :
    04/24/2014 at 1:49 pm

    I would LOVE a new mirror, but not in our toilet. The onley office mirror we have is in the toilet that Frank camp’s out in most of the morning so if I realy need to check my lipstick, I do NOT use that mirror. I go out to the toilet in the hall, b/c our’s smells realy bad b/c of Frank’s poopie in there. FOOEY! The ONLEY time I realy can use the mirror by Frank is if I go in there BEFORE he gets in there and that is onley in the morning b/f I go to court. YAY unless he come’s in to look (or go), and then I get out of there quick! I can be very NIMBEL when I need to be. YAY!!!!!

  11. Ellen :
    04/24/2014 at 10:14 am

    Yay! I love Ann Taylor and this dress! Even tho it is a V neck, the V is not to deep, so Frank will realy have to look deep if he is mineing for boobie gold. I will ask the manageing partner if I can buy it, b/c I love the littel black dress look, and I should be abel to wear it into court, at least in the Summer. YAY!!!!

    I had a good talk with Lynn. She can realy eat! But anyway, I warned her about getting to close to Mason emotionaly b/c he is not yet mature enough to handel a real relationship. She said she understood, but she is also getting alot out of it. He is at least clean, she say’s, and he has not been with alot of women so she is abel to teach him thing’s, which he is very apreaciateive of. She does not think he want’s to marry her, yet, but she is hopeing that he will turn out positive, meaning that he will get addicted to what she does for him rather than goeing out and testing whether other women will do better for him, emotionaly as well as in the bedroom and the kitchen. She told me a few gross things about him which I will NOT share based on privacy reason’s but all in all, she could do alot worse, considering she does NOT have a college degree and is looseing her figure to quickley. FOOEY!

    I did warn her that she should get married while she is still cute, b/c once she get’s to porky (and over 30), w/o a degree that make’s her marketable in the busness world, guy’s will not want to marry her, or even have sex with her. She was very nice and thanked me for the pasta. She took some back with her and I saw Mason eateing it at around 5 yesterday. They are both back in and again she is weareing the same dress as yesterday, so she did NOT go home as I thought she would, but spent the night again with him. I hope this does not backfire on her. But we all have to live our lives, and now I have to find my OWN guy who will do thing’s for ME! YAY!!!!

  12. Ellen as a process server! Love the reference to Subpeenie's! Ellenwatch, I know this must be you behind all of these!

    Ellen :
    04/23/2014 at 2:44 pm

    I was in this VERY situeation. I worked after law school as a process server for a slippery guy in an office on Canal Street (FOOEY), and then I decided to “lateral” into my job with the manageing partner when he offered me a job. It was an easy decision for me b/c I did NOT see alot of future in process serveing. The men were sleazey, and all they did was pinch my tuchus. The women all smoked cigarette’s and they must also have gotten black and blue mark’s on their tuchuses from all of the pincheing. And when I went to serve either a COMPLAEINT or a SUBPEENIE, the peeople were rude and/or did NOT answer the door, and I learned if that happened just to throw the COMPLAEINT or the SUBPEENIE away and just sign the affidavid that I served it anyway. FOOEY b/c it was NOT even true!

    So when the manageing partner said I could work doing REAL LEGAL WORK, it was an easy decision. It took a few month’s b/f he realized just how smart I was, and now I am a partner! YAY!!!!!!

    1. FOOEY on ellenwatch. I think she is getting too much sex to post. Come up for air and post. There's more to life than phallic balancing!

  13. Why are these posts so old? What happened to Ellenwatch? Is it true that she is getting too much sex on her own? What the heck is "phallic balancing"? Somehow, I am conjuring up an image of a inverted gyroscope spinning atop a desk, with its phallus-like tip being used for sexual penetration? Am I misguided or is this what is occupying Ellenwatch? If so, how can we get men to provide us with similar sexual pleasures?

  14. Bring back Ellenwatch. This style is worse than having to go down on a broad that hasn't scrubbed up for a week. Even if you are drunk, the stench will sober you up faster than ammonia.

  15. I bet she is the next DEEP THROAT! A veritable Linda Lovelace able to take in Harry Reems!

  16. I really do NOT want to be the scribe for Ellenwatch. I therefore will only do a few.


    Ellen :

    05/12/2014 at 9:34 am

    Yay! Pricey Monday’s! I love Pricey Monday’s and this sheathe dress, but your right, it is better on Sale, if you can wait. I would buy it today, but my tuchus is way to big to make this work. I think I would need a size 6 b/c it is very fitted and at this point, with MY tuchus, I would have to buy 2 sizes up and it would NOT look good.

    I am still walkeing, and I walked in today, and it is getting HOT out! FOOEY! And it is onley MAY! I think by the time it is July, I will be sweateing my tuchus off, which I guess is a good thing, but we need to moove to a place with a shower b/c it is dumb for me to go to NYSC in the morning JUST to shower and change, and then I have to walk here? That is dumm! DOUBLE FOOEY on that. The manageing partner is still lookeing at places, now on 2nd avenue — we are moveing closer to a BUS ride for me, instead of the subway, which can be smelley in the summer with peeople peeing in the subway, it start’s to STINK. TRIPEL FOOEY! I can take a bus, mabye down Second Avenue, or Mabye Lex, but it HAS to be an express bus, otherwise, it take’s to long to go block by block, pickeing up and droppeing off so many peeople! I would perfer a DRIVER, which when I am the manageing partner, will have dad ask for, but for now, it is FITBIT CITY, with tuchus reduction bieng my MAIN GOAL!!! Yay!!!!

    The Hockey guy was back in town, texteing me — he wanted to meet me to eat b/f the Ranger game, but I was UPTOWN and was NOT about to go back to PENN STATION AGAIN! I was there yesterday when I came back from LI, and the acountant told me I am OK even if I do not work b/c dad has made “provision’s” for me. That is nice, but I need to worry about not onley me, but my CHILDREN, if I find a guy to Marry me and have children. So it look’s like I will be workeing at least until I find a guy to MARRY me, and then HE can work for all of us. That is why the scruffy guy simply will NOT do. I need a guy who make’s enough for ALL of us, so that I can stay home and tend to all thing’s DOMESTIC — I am sure I do NOT want to do anything with the family finance’s. But for now, I have to start first with getting a guy to date me who does NOT just want sex. That is probabley the biggest challenge of my life, b/c every guy just want’s me to take my clothe’s off for them and that is NOT what I was taught in school to do. FOOEY!!!

  17. This is a good one. You would think Ellenwatch would have commented here, given the number of others who did, but, as usual, we can count on Ellenwatch for one thing: Nothing at all!


    Ellen :

    05/09/2014 at 2:15 pm

    Yay! Open thread’s! I love open thread’s and nice dresses like this one! My onley probelem with MAXI dresses is that I often step on them when I am walkeing UP stair’s. It’s almost as if I have to lift up the skirt 3 or 4 inches when I walk up the stair’s (which is dificult when you are carrying a lit bag), so as NOT to step on the hem. FOOEY!

    When I was in college I had a maxi dress with clog’s and when I was walking up stair’s in the science’s building, I did just that and I literaly ripped the dress OFF b/c the wasteline was very thin (and tight b/c of my waste), and steppeing and pulleing resulted in me looseing my dress! Fortuneately, onley a few girls saw me loose my dress and since it was a loose fitting dress, I was abel to wrap it back around my waste sideway’s, and turn it inward so it was tight against my tuchus. So it went from a MAXI to a mini-wrap in 30 second’s with the help of 2 girls. YAY!!!!

    This weekend, I am goeing over my fineance’s with dad b/c he want’s me to know about ALL of my holdeings in case anything hapens to him before I find a guy to MARRY me and take over for dad with my fineance’s. The accounteant will be there also so I will NOT have to listen to hard b/c I will just ask the accounteant to teach my husband whatever he needs to know. All I care about is to be abel to have enough money to go shoppeing when I need to. YAY!!!!! My husband better NOT be a micromanager. FOOEY on that or I will NOT marry him.

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    Ru :

    05/09/2014 at 4:44 pm

    Ellen, you bring up a very good point. I always found it quite ladylike when I have to lift up the hem of my long skirt or dress to walk up the staires, almost like olden tymes.

    And I am so happy you brought up the marriage thing, I completely understand. My parents give me a hard time about marriage. FOOEY on these silly men who won’t marry professionel women like us!

    Reply Report

    Silvercurls :

    05/09/2014 at 11:14 pm

    Very good Ellen-ing! :-)

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    VJK :

    05/10/2014 at 12:10 pm

    I might marry Ellen. She makes a good living and sounds cute. I’d have to see how she performed in the bedroom first.

    Reply Report

    Mona :

    05/10/2014 at 2:35 pm

    How charitable this oaf is! He will do her a favor by marrying her? What does HE have to offer? I say nothing. We want men who bring something tangible to the table. The days are long gone when we depended on men for support and succor. Now we rightfully deserve and demand men who treat us as equals and will not leach off us and our paychecks. If this guy styles himself as a boytoy or some other catch, I’d advise Ellen and anyone else to throw him back. Who needs a guy that will have nothing but a prescription for Levitra in 5 years? A trip to Babeland makes a lot more sense to me.

    Anonymous :

    05/10/2014 at 9:17 pm

    What a putz!

  18. Ellen :

    05/09/2014 at 10:14 am

    Yay!!! Fruegel Friday’s!!!! I love Fruegel Friday’s and this fruegel SILK Blouse. I agree with Kat that the Keyhole HAS TO BE SMALL b/c of guy’s like Frank. When I wore a keyhole blouse in after I first started, Frank put his finger in and asked if I had the Key. I said NOT for him, only my HUSBAND. He got the idea NOT to put his finger’s where they did NOT belong. FOOEY on him. If he want’s to stick his finger’s somewhere, he has a WIFE for that, NOT me.

    The hockey guy was around yesterday on his way back to Pitsburgh and he said we should date. He still has a beard so I said NO. He said he would cut it off for me after Stanley Cup’s. I have NO idea what that has to do with it. FOOEY on that I said. I onley date clean shaven guy’s.

    This morning I saw a picture of some guy with a baseball cap they are lookeing for that was gropeing women in Astoria, and I think he has the exact same baseball cap as the guy who grabbed my tuchus a few month’s ago in the subway. I think it must be when a guy wear’s a baseball cap that he need’s to think he is MACHO, and for looser’s, that mean’s haveing to grope a woman’s tuchus (and/or boobie’s).

    Sam is very happy that Willem is out of the picture. I am also b/c I did NOT want to be his housefrow in Belgum with his mother and grandmother teacheing me wifely dutie’s. I could only imagine haveing to wait all day for Willem to come home and then have to give him his pair of wooden clogs to wear and then me haveing to provide him with a healthy dinner, with the mother and grandmother looking over to make sure we then went to bed to procreate baby Willem’s! FOOEY! He did NOT care that I was a trained lawyer. He and his family just wanted me to be a breeder for them. Lynn could be a breeder, but NOT me. FOOEY!

    Reply Report

    Lily-Student :

    05/10/2014 at 7:03 am

    Oh my gosh, I got Ellen’d. Now I feel like I belong!

  19. Ellen :

    05/08/2014 at 4:19 pm

    Yay! I am not to crazy about these flat’s — the price is about $700 to high! FOOEY! I personaly LOVE flat’s b/c I can wear them around the office, but the manageing partner insist’s that I wear 4″ heel’s to court, so I now make MASON come with me and carry my lit bag (which include’s my heels), so I can just carry my purse and food downtown. When we get there and we go thru the mettle detector’s, I then have Mason give me the lit bag, I give him the flat’s and he keep’s them in HIS briefcase so that if I have to go into my Lit Bag to show something to the Judge and opposeing counsel, they will NOT see my flat’s. Mason has been pretty good about that.

    I forgot to tell the Hive that Lynn is now goieng home at least 3x a week, and NOT sleepeing over at Mason’s every day b/c I told her she was lookeing a bit frumpey wearing the same clotheing 2 day’s in a row. Mason is not happy b/c he has to hold his own on those nites Lynn is not there. I told Lynn that if she realy needs him at Night, that Mason should sleep over at HER place those night’s, but she does NOT live alone and she does NOT think her roomate’s would like haveing this guy over makeing noise in the bedroom at nite with Lynn. I would NOT either b/c Lynn told me some pretty dissgusting thing’s about what Mason does in the bedroom and batheroom. DOUBEL FOOEY! I would NOT let a guy like that any where near me and my apartement.

    Sam took me out for deli last weekend and it was good. I realy should own a deli b/c then I could have all the corn beef I can eat. But then my tuchus would be totaly out of control. I think I have to get a copy of Vanity Fair so I can read about Monica Louinsky. I can NOT beleive she would do that with the President of the Untied States. What was she thinkeing? That he would marry her if she did that? I also do not even want to think if he EVER smoked those cigar’s! TRIPEL FOOEY! She clearly could have gotten a UTI infection from that stuff b/c you can NEVER be sure where those cigar’s have been. Alan once tried to suggest somethings like that and I said get away from me with that, and it turned out I was right NOT to let him get “adventureaus” with me. I am a very conservative girl at heart so it was good that I chased Alan away–as it was he still abandoned me when I wanted for him to Marry me. FOOOEY on men that do that to us. At least Mason has not tried that yet. Lynn has done alot of funny thing’s like that b/f with other men, so she knows how to Handel Mason. She does need to get married soon b/f she looses her good look’s and figure. She said she will. YAY!!!!!

  20. Ellen :

    05/08/2014 at 12:41 pm

    Rosa gave me 2 pair’s of COMMANDO COTTON BIKINI’s. They are expensive (Ed paid for them) but they are GREAT b/c even with my TUCHUS, there are no panty line’s showeing! Now If I could ONLEY make my tuchus disappear! FOOEY! Then I could be a MAJICIEAN! YAY!!!!!

    Reply Report

    Bargain hunter :

    05/08/2014 at 1:09 pm

    +1! Have been wearing these for years and love them. They’re called Vanishing Edge. I’ve learned that you want them to fit on the smaller side rather than the bigger side for best invisible results.

  21. Ellen :

    05/08/2014 at 9:43 am

    Yay! I love this dress, and I love the Limited!!! Mom take’s me shoppeing there alot when I go home to LI!

    Yesterday, we had a YUMMY cookout at Rosa’s house. Beleive it or not, the kid’s were all on their best behaviour b/c Myrna was there and they were in ABSOLUTE AWWE of her, b/c she was dressed up for a run (which she did thru Chapaqua afterward). Ed even got home earley and grilled up the BEST RIBEYE’ steak’s (BONE IN, OF COURSE). Ed told me that Merrill Lynch is lookeing for more litiegator’s and they pay well, but it would NOT be in W/C. I told him I would onley do litieagation for them if I could just go over and do W/C cases, b/c I could just take all the form’s over on my MACBOOK AIR and just change the name of the RESPONDANT from whoever is listed there to Merrill Lynch, and the rest would be the same. Ed say’s he has never known anyone fileing a W/C claim b/c the worst injurie’s they get there is paper cut’s. He is probabley right, but if I could get the W/C job, I would ONLEY have to work mabye 30 hour’s a week, and get out by 4:30 every day! YAY!!!!!!

    I took the subway in today b/c it was drizzelling out and I did NOT want to get my hair wet. It already is SOOO Frizzie from the HUMIDITY, and it is NOT even hot out yet. I am NOT lookeing forward to the Summer, where I will have to walk in the HEAT and HUMIDITY. FOOEY!!!!!

    Dad is wondering why my FITBIT step’s are down in the last 2 day’s. That is b/c my Macbook air is not starteing up right. I think I will have to brieng it into the apple store and have the guy’s at the genus bar fix it. Mabye I need a NEW machine, b/c mine is already more then 2 year’s old. Does anyone in the hive have issue’s with their Macbook Air’s? Mabye there is some sort of virus goeing around with them I am NOT aware of? DOUBEL FOOEY if there is. I wonder why these computer geek’s make viruses. Myrna say’s it is b/c they can NOT find girlfreind’s. Mabye she is right b/c I could NEVER see myself dateing a computer geek! They usueally have alot of food stuck in between their teeth. TRIPEL FOOEY ON THAT b/c their breathe also STINK’S! FOOEY!

  22. Ellen :

    05/08/2014 at 11:26 am

    I agree with the other poster’s, with one CAVEATT:

    It is a GIFT, and you should NOT look a gift horse in the mouth (whatever that mean’s). Beside’s you say he MAKES MORE then you, so let it go. I assume you are being INTIMATE with him so it is worth it to him to pay for the vacation, but if you are NOT being intimate with him already, you can be SURE that he will want to get intimate on the vacation, b/c he has paid for it.

    When I was in college, this hapened to me. I was NOT intimate with a guy, but then he waited on line for me bought me a bus ticket to Florida for spring break, which I wanted to pay him for but he absolutely REFUSED. I should have figured out that some thing was up with him b/c he was grinneing at me on the bus alot, and when we got to Florida, even tho we had traveled with other peeople and stayed in different room’s at the same hotel, he wanted me to have sex with him in MY room when he came over to say hello. I REFUSED to have sex with him! He said I would NOT be in Florida w/o that ticket he gave me, so I should give him sex. I did NOT understand how he thought that giving me a bus ticket entitled him to have sex. He left with his tail between his leg’s b/c I did NOT even do anything with him. FOOEY on men that demand sex for bus ticket’s. It would be another thing if he was already my boyfreind, but he was NOT and there was NO WAY I would want to be intimate with him anyway.

    Reply Report

    Anonymous :

    05/08/2014 at 12:28 pm


    Reply Report

  23. Ellen :

    05/07/2014 at 3:21 pm

    I love Bannana Republic and this outfit, espeacially the skirt and blazer combo–it is just formal enough for the manageing partner to pay for! Especialy b/c I do NOT have a summer outfit in Navy. Just grey, white, black and his favoreatite — RED!!!! YAY!!!! I think I would look OK in Navy with a White Silk Blouse he already bought for me when I needed to land a new cleint and impress the judge. I am tired of red and white and now need BLUE — almost patriotic I guess, but NOT at the same time.

    As for the OP, we do NOT have a formal sucession plan at our firm, but my dad want’s me to become the next manageing partner b/c I am bringeing in so much busness that is CRITICAL for the firm. If the OP is just a first year, she should know that having stability is VERY important, both in school as well as in a law firm, so we all have to think “what would we do if anything happened to the manageing partner?” In fact, Margie would also be worried b/c she is about to give birth, so the manageing partner has many more year’s he has to work. Margie confided in me that he was not sure he was still potent, but it turned out he still is “packing it”. I think that means he has active sperms, but mabye she was refering to his tecknique. Either way, she is pregenant with HIS child and he now has to work for the next 20 years or so, which make’s it tough for ME b/c I wanted to become manageing partner alot sooner then when I am in my 50′s. FOOEY! I wanted to be on the cover of NYC’s top lawyer’s as the manageing partner in our firm long before my boobies start sagging and my tuchus get’s even bigger! DOUBEL FOOEY!

    So I guess sucesion planning should also take into consideration your look’s. You want to take over while you are still cute so that you can get on the cover of the magazaine, not just a footnote for just another middel age woman lawyer with a tuchus. TRIPEL FOOEY!

  24. Ellen :

    05/07/2014 at 1:45 pm

    Welcome Kate! This is so cool!!!! Kate and Kat!!! And she is VERY accomplished also! I once knew a guy in college from upstate who wanted to date me — he lived in Pokeepsie, and he was VERY nice, but dad did NOT like him b/c he did NOT work. His mom gave him MONEY to spend, and he did spend it, but he NEVER wanted to earn money. FOOEY! Dad said he was a doosh and for me to stay away from him, so I did. I do NOT think he ever gradueated college either and he might still live in Pokeepsie — we took the Amtrack home together some times. He sometime’s had bad breathe, so I do not think I ever thought of him as date material. He also smoked so that made his breathe STINK. DOUBEL FOOEY!

    Myrna is pickeing me up today and we are driveing up to Weschester to eat at Rosa’s. She is haveing a cookout even tho it is NOT the weekend b/c the wether is so nice. The manageing partner said he would have come, but Margie is still haveing Morning Sickness and she is due very soon!!!!! Yay!

  25. Ellen :

    05/07/2014 at 10:43 am

    YAY! I love Ann Taylor and this sheathe dress, tho the floral print I am NOT to much in love with. I would ask that they give me a different print then this one. FOOEY, b/c the price is good b/c of the funkie print, and a nice sheathe dress in a solid color is MORE with Ann Taylor!

    As for the OP, I just flew back to NYC from Pitsburgh, and it was a NON-STOP flight. Now I know that you are comeing from somewhere INTERNATIONAL, and whereever you are, you may NOT be abel to get a NON-STOP flight, but how about a “direct” flight? That way, you do NOT have to worry about missing your conection, b/c it is just sitting there while the peeople go in and empty the poopie from the bathroom and take out all the schmutz from the seat’s while you go in and buy food and clotheing and wine and drink at the duty free shop. Ask your secretary to get you on a DIRECT flight and you will NOT have much of any LAYOVER, b/c it is already there! When dad was overseas, he would NOT take a flight unless it was DIRECT, and when I traveled with my parent’s overseas on vacation, we alway’s took a DIRECT flight. If you get one of these, you should be OK.

    And one last thing, be carful in Dubai by weareing a long dress with covered sleeve’s. Even tho they are more progresive there, women are still looked at diferently, and NOT considered equal to men. You could get into troubel if you are uncovered and then aproach a man there, even to ask direction’s. You do NOT want to be acused of being some kind of vixen or something, trying to snag a rich guy. Even I do NOT want a guy who has money that will NOT treat me as an EQUAL, even tho I have advanced legal treaining and am admitted to the NY Bar, and in good standeing as an attorney at law. Men just do NOT care unless they get sex and I am NOT interested in having some guy do pushe-up’s on me pretending that he care’s about me then rolling off and walkeing away, like Alan did. FOOEY on that also! DOUBEL FOOEY on men like that, even if they are in another country. They are all alike. TRIPEL FOOEY!

  26. Ellen :

    05/06/2014 at 4:20 pm

    Yay! Coffee Break! I love this break b/c I have been in medieation all day. We have this cleint that require’s us to medieate even after a case is filed, so there is a stay in place while we medieate!

    This employee is not even hurt. Our investigeator has a video of him playeing softball and slideing into third base! OMG, we have him skewered, the manageing partner says, so we will not settel unless it is for less then 4 figure’s. This is a new cleint, so I am very lucky to have the video! YAY!!!!

    As for the OP, I checked with Madeline, and she agree’s not to be to pushy b/c it is not likely to occur unless some thing happens to the trustee’s. Beside’s I agree that he is ONLEY your boyfreind, and unless you get MARRIED to him, the chances of it effecteing your life is miminmal. Madeline doubt’s you will be abel to marry this guy if you are that bossy now. She think’s a guy will NOT want to marry someone who is to bossy, even if you are great sexueally. I agree. Best to NOT give him a hard time until you are already MARRIED and with child, b/c by then, you will be protected from divorce and he will be stuck. YAY!!!!

  27. Ellen :

    05/05/2014 at 3:45 pm

    I think it is b/c peeople want to know if you are MARRIED, then they have to invite your spouse, and if you have kid’s then they can have play date’s with their kid’s while you have your business meeting’s!

    Not a probelem, b/c I hope soon that I will be abel to say I am MARRIED, and the year after that I have at least 1 child. By the time I have 2 kid’s, I hope to be RETIRED from the busness world, at least until the kid’s are in school. YAY! But first I need a BOYFREIND! Why can’t I just find a boyfreind who want’s to MARRY me and have kid’s NOW! You would think that with all of their focus on my tuchus and boobie’s and haveing sex, that haveing kids would also be in the picture? No way they say.

    Just fun and run, that’s what they want. I say if I have sex, I want children, but that does NOT go over to well with these guys in NYC. Mabye the bearded guy from Pitsburgh might be interested, but he is way to young for me. We will see. He need’s to shave in any event, b/c I do NOT want that beard tickeling me! FOOEY!

  28. Ellen :

    05/05/2014 at 2:23 pm

    I agree with all of the other p’oster’s. You do NOT have to have peirced earing’s to be fashionabel, tho I had mine done when I was a littel GIRL, so no issue’s here. Nowaday’s so many peeople have multipel peirceing that they look like they are from another PLANET, if NOT another contenent. FOOEY! I do NOT want to look like some kind of voodoo doll with earing’s in my NOSE and belly button! DOUBEL FOOEY ON THAT!

    Dont even get me started on this b/c the next thing KAT will ask about is tatoo’s! I do NOT want anyone puting any tatoo’s on ME! Rosa was about to get one when she was in college but I had a fit and told her that she would look TAWDREY if she had one, even a socalled ‘tastful” one — like a heart or something on her ankel, but I still said NO WAY HOZE when she asked my opinion. I know she is glad she never had one b/c Ed told her that he had onley 3 or 4 NO-NO’s: Those were 1) smokeing, 2) drinkeing to excess 3) noze peirceing and 4) any tatoo’s.

    Rosa never smoked even once, and she hardley even drink’s a martini, she only has her ear’s peirced (once in each ear) and she did NOT do tatoo’s. Ed said that these 3 thing’s were thing’s he would NOT tolearate in a spouse, so Rosa would NEVER be even married to Ed if she got a tatoo. FOOEY on anyone who doe’s these thing’s b/c they can NOT get a guy like ED to marry them. I conclude if you want a decent guy to marry, do NOT do any of these thing’s and undo whatever you can if you want a guy like Ed. YAY!!!!!!!

  29. Ellen :

    05/05/2014 at 9:47 am

    Yay! Pricey Monday’s! I love Pricey Monday’s and this sheathe dress! But as the OP say’s, me agree’s that she is VERY svelte and there is NO WAY I could get my tuchus into this dress without busteing out at the seam’s! FOOEY! Mabye Rosa can pull this one off, but NOT me! DOUBEL FOOEY!

    But anyway, I am back from Pitsburgh and am wearing one of my new Schrunchie’s! These are great! I finaly figure’d out what was goieng on with all the beard’s there. They have a hockey team and they are playing the Ranger’s, so when I was at the airport, a bunch of scruffy guy’s started talkeing to me and told me they are rooting for the team by NOT shaveing. I wonder if the webhead’s in NYC are rooting for some team I am NOT aware of. When I told these guy’s I am from NYC, they said they would be heading for NYC because they are Pitsburgh Penguin Fan’s. I did NOT think Penguin’s were very macho — they just waddel around like Rosa did when she was pregenenant, so why Penguin’s? They said b/c they live up @ the North Pole, and can swim and skate on the ice. They wanted to know if I was MARRIED or was dateing anyone in Pitsburgh, so I said NO and one big scruffy one (Butch) said “I would MARRY you if you could cook”, and I said he was lucky b/c I onley knew one dish (Wedding Chicken), and he said that was good enough for him. So he got my # and has been texteing me ever since. FOOEY! That guy need’s a shave and is onley 24 and does NOT even work. How old does he think I am anyway? I did NOT tell him. So Butch is comeing to watch his team this week, and I said that mabye I would meet him and his scruffy freind’s for dinner b/c they are playing near to here — Madison Square Garden. I told them I do NOT get drunk, and they seemed sad about that. I remember in college when my room mate got drunk, they wound up wakeing up in some dorm, all covered with beer and smelley, and she lost her underwear, which the guy’s hoysted up the flag pole in the quad. How embarasing was that! TRIPEL FOOEY!

    Reply Report

    Mara :

    05/05/2014 at 1:17 pm

    You are so right not to drink with men. Many college women get date raped and they were so drunk they don’t even remember it happening. Men like that should be neutered.

  30. Ellen :

    05/02/2014 at 3:15 pm

    Yay! Open thread’s! I love open thread’s! And converse sneaker’s! I have a red pair that I ONLEY wear on weekend’s when I walk around town w/my Fitbit! Mom is useing my fitbit today while I stay in the HOTEL watching TV. We are leaveing later — we have late checkout (4PM) so we can catch a plane home. Dad is mad that mom did NOT leave him enough meal’s for him to eat so he went out to eat in Manhaseat on his own. He almost made Rosa come down to prepare a dinner for him, but she would have had to bring the babie’s by herself and dad did NOT want to have to deal with them by himself just for a home cooked meal. YAY!

    As for the OP, hug’s to you. Do NOT worry about the exam. We all could alway’s be more prepared, but you are smarter then you think. Just go in there, do it, and forget about it. You will do FINE, b/c you have the POWER OF THE HIVE behind you. Dad alway’s told me this and it worked. Now, he uses that same line to say I have the power of the tuchus behind me. Thank’s dad, I know my tuchus is big, but so is mom’s tuchus and you have been married to her for 34 year’s! FOOEY!

    Mom has just walked back in so I will have to give her back this ipad so she can check flight times and all that. We have a few hours to get to the airport, so I will sine off and rejoin the hive next week, when I will be back at work with the manageing partner. I wonder if he missed me? I hope NOT! FOOEY!

    Reply Report

    Poppy :

    05/02/2014 at 3:42 pm

    Good luck! Now get off this website and go study! ;)

    Reply Report

    Pat :

    05/02/2014 at 7:48 pm

    Good luck on the exam. Try to understand what you’re studying rather than memorize. It will stay with you longer and you can answer the questions much better. Get a good night sleep and don’t stress out during the exam.

    Reply Report

    Cubelife :

    05/02/2014 at 10:49 pm

    Thank you guys soooo much!! And OMG. Ellen replied to me. Day made lol.

    Reply Report

  31. Where the f is Ellenwatch?