I actually think Myrna's openness to Harold is the bigger story here, though (see bottom). Sure she says she's kidding, but these jokes demonstrate a fair bit of imagination--as to how she would power through the dread assignment of sleeping with him. What's going on?
Yay! Pricey Monday’s! I love Pricey Monday’s and this Sheathe dress! But what is with the model’s leg’s? She look’s like she was rideing a horse all weekend, no? Myrna participated in some sort of IRON WOMAN contest on the beach over the weekend and there were alot of SCAREY women there–one woman even had a mustach! FOOEY! But Myrna did well, especialy in the run on the beach where she even beat the woman with the mustach. We found out later that the woman with the mustach worked for the local fire departement! DOUBEL FOOEY, b/c if you are in a fire, you do NOT want your mustach (or any other hair) to catch on FIRE!
Willem bought me a ticket to Belgum for June 8, which he say’s is OK b/c if I can NOT make it, it is fuly refundeable, but I am feeleing a littel pressure now to have to date him exclusivly b/c it is soooo expensive to go to Belgum on a refundeable ticket! Beside’s his mother and grandmother now want me over there to teach me some “wifeley secret’s”….I can ONLEY wonder what that is about. Also, the manageing partner keep’s asking about new case’s and he does NOT want me doieng any PRO BONO this summer, like I have done with peeople who need estate planning advise, which Madeline and I do at the local law school. TRIPEL FOOEY b/c some of those peeople have money and eligibel son’s that I might be able to date and MARRY, so I would NOT have to go to Belgum.
I found a $5 bill on the beach–it was bloweing around and there was NOT one person to ask if it was their’s, so Myrna and I went to Dunking Donut’s and had a coffee and donut with it! YAY!!!! We did NOT tell Dad, b/c he was NOT pleased with my tuchus and said that it is no wonder that only a Belgan person would want to marry me and that tuchus, b/c it get’s cold in the winter in Belgum, and he remember’s spending a few nights with a Belgan woman with a big tuchus. Mom was NOT happy to hear this, but she was NOT suprised, b/c Dad has alway’s had a big ego (and a lot of testerone, mom say’s, that make’s him need to have women at night). FOOEY, b/c I do NOT want Willem needeing me at night.
Harold also texted me. He said he was passeing Crumb’s and thought of me. I do NOT want men thinkeing of me just when they pass a bakery. Myrna think’s Harold might be fun, even if he is baldeing and has bad breathe. She say’s she can wash his mouth out with Listereane, and put a bag over his head if she has to. FOOEY b/c I could NEVER think of him in a sexueal way. I keep thinkeing of the manageing partner, and that is what Harold will look like in mabye 30 year’s! DOUBEL FOOEY!
Wifely secrets? WTF? This sounds gross -- these old women telling Ellen how to please her man in bed? UGH. If the guys in Belgium are chauvinists, Ellen will never survive. I say she should not get railroaded into heading to Belgium, even if the ticket is free.
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