Sunday, September 30, 2012

jack of all tradees

As we were warned, Ellen is stuck at work today. I had assumed that when she said she'd have no time for "shopping" she meant the back-in-town grocery run, but no: increasingly visible gal pal Myrna was expecting a trip to Macy's with her freind. (Can I go instead?) 
Jim just keeps getting less and less viable; more and more comic. As to the bigger picture, I think we have a pretty clean break from Ellen's Rosh Hashanah spiritual elevation. In other words, she's back to judging and fooeying and suspecting per usual. The largesse simply couldn't last. In my capacity as ELLENWatch, I'm not sure how to feel about this. Would the novelty have worn off if Ellen stayed all pieceful and magnanimus? Or would it have made for a more compelling story, to have a truly fundamental shift within its protagonist? 

Wait til next year?

Ellen :
It is Sunday and I can not beleive I am already at work! I got home at 11:45 Friday after along flieght and a cab ride with a smelly guy! FOOEY! I was zonked out yesterday when Myrna called and I did not have the energy to meet her at Macy’s.
Now I am the onley one here drafteing up briefs for the judge tomorrow while everyone else is home relaxing. It is times like this when I wish I was married and home. FOOEY!
And Jim has me drop him off on the cab ride b/c he had no money and he said it was on the way to manhattan! It was NOT and it was in a dumpy place in Queens that I never saw before. That ride to his place alone was over $24 and I had another half hour in the smelly cab. I do not like that even tho I will bill PORTAL TO PORTAL FOR THAT!!!
I have to do all my time sheets by tomorrow b/c Frank needs to bill out to all cleint’s next week! I am a jack of all tradees my dad says. Back to work so I can get outta here by 3 pm. Yay!

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Friday, September 28, 2012

gone OVER his per deeim

Welcome back, Ellen! Very glad that this trip didn't entail any interruption of post's. 
In case anyone was wondering just how thoroughly Jim has cumulatively struck out, it's now settled even more decidedly. Ellen picks up the tab for dinner because Jim--forget car service!--is already straining his leash due to what was most likely indeed a few XXX sessions to help get through do diligeince. I do suspect this means he will never again expect to be taken seriously when talking about ring's and so on. NALE in the coffin.

Ellen :
Yay! Open Thread’s! I am coming home today!!!! I can’t wait!!!! But we are not done, and I may have to come back next month. FOOEY!
We have office party’s too, and the manageing partner allways calls up the theme’s we have to do. When we had a Haloween party, everyone had to get dressed up as a GOBLIN or a Witch or a Warlock. Fooey! It was very unsanitary.
Anyway, Jim made me use MY credit card to pay for dinner. He said I could bill it back but I thought that was cheezy. I asked him why, and he said he had already gone OVER his per deeim, so I put dinner on MY credit card. I was not sure what he was spendeing his money on, but he did say he was watcheing movies in the hotel room TV. I bet those were the one’s NOT suitable for children. FOOEY on that.
I have a 7pm flight to LGA, which mean’s I will NOT get home until real late tonite, so I will NOT be abel to do shopping and laundry tomorrow and I have to go in SUNDAY to do a few brief’s for motions on Monday. I wish these plaintiff’s just did NOT show up so I could do a 3211(a)(7), b/c I have done alot of those before, but these guy’s want to get paid. Fooey!

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Thursday, September 27, 2012

at heart at the end of the day

The Sunshine Girls are fast becoming my trustiest deputies. Once again they have called my attention to a post that I missed, and they're being much more forgiveing than usual: 

Interesting but you missed one in the 9/25 coffee break from Ellen herself. BTW wo is Laura anyway? We only care about Ellen and her clothing allowance. We may go to our own MP for similar treatment. Keep up the commentary. We are now concerned about Harold. 

I was aware of your concern about Harold, but perhaps I underestimated its urgency. I don't know how much harm he can really do at MP's party next weekend, but it's entirely possible that you ladies know something I don't. As to the other point's: Laura is one of your colleagues, and let me know whether you, too, secure clotheing subsidisezes. If your MP needs a model to work from feel free to send him a link to this blog. In other words, if you aren't already Ellen this could be one step further in the right direction! Be warned that open-toe shoes are ineligible. 

Finally, here's the Yom Kippur post I missed, which provides background for the increase to 30%. As is well established, Math/analytic reasoning is not an area of strength for Ellen.

Ellen :
I found a place to go to service’s tomorow, but tonite I will NOT be abel to go. Jim is takeing me out for a Brisekette dinner–my mom know’s how to make it real good, but I am not sure about down here. We shall see…. This do diliegience is TOTALY BORING. I can NOT beleive that I have to do this. I really am a litiegietor at heart at the end of the day.
If my clotheing allowance get’s upped to 30%, I will be abel to buy 10% more clothe’s for the same price. That is a real gift if true. The manageing partner will probabely be abel to convince the other partner’s that it is a good investement, especialy since I am billeing now on what the manageing partner calls portal to portal, begining when I leave the hotel room until I return to the hotel room, other then 30 minute’s for LUNCH. This is GREAT!!!!

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being a litiegiator is NOT alot of fun

So Ellen did get her clothing reimbursement rate upped to 30%. In other news, confirmed that MP's anniversary party is happening next weekend, and that Harold doesn't just dress grungie; he in fact smells. 

Ellen :
My father knows, b/c he knows peeple in the broker business and owns stock in alot of companies but I know you have to sell through a stock BROKER like him, and you have to pay a comission. You can NOT sell it to someone yourself. Just call Charles Shwabb. They know.
My diliegience is going very well. The manageing partner keep’s sending me e-mails to make sure that mark down my hour’s for billeing purpose’s. He also confirmed I am now at 30% b/c the other partners agreed I am a good representative of the firm. The manageing partner said I HAVE to go to court this Monday on 15 more cases he is monitoring, which mean’s that I will NOT be abel to relax on Sunday, but will HAVE to go in to prepare for caleandar call. I warned him that 2 of the cases on the calendar require that MOTION’s be written, and he said I can do that SUNDAY in the office. FOOEY! Sometimes being a litiegiator is NOT alot of fun, even if the judge’s like me I still have to do work. I told him I will be driveing out to his party with Harold next weekend. I hope Harold wear’s clean clotheing tho, b/c it is along drive, and his car is not that big.
Enough of this, I have to work and bill, PORTAL TO PORTAL. Yay!

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in their “war room”…..

Look forward to hearing how dinner goe's. I guess there really isn't any reason to assume Jim won't use the do diligeince trip to stage his marriage proposal...

Ellen :
I love APPLE CIDER! But it has to be very warm with alot of spice’s in it! Yay!
I am still here in Tennesssee, doing alot of dilieigence (in speakeing to the attorney’s for the “target”, they have told me alot of thing’s about their company that I have to put on the chart to tell Jim, and Jim is going to bring all of this up with his General Council.
It is also their document’s I am lookeing at. We are in their “war room”…..I don’t know why they call it a war room. I did NOT get to walk around town yet.
Jim is takeing me out for Barbe-Que tonite. I do NOT want to eat to much b/c I am NOT geting any excercize at the health facility at the HOTEL. Jim has been workeing out at the hotel gym but he is NOT doeing any real work here. FOOEY! That is why workeing in house is so easy compared to what I am doeing.

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Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Men should be chivalrous and buy the meals.

And nobody paged me! I wonder how many like this I may be missing? 
"Laura" is a known Ellen freind, but we haven't seen her for quite some time. 

Laura :
I started to let men pay for my lunch and dinner. They want to and splitting the bill is something that is cumbersome.
Men should be chivalrous and buy the meals.
At the same time, it saves us money and we do other things anyway.

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I have to be here all week!

New information: the duration of Ellen's do diligeince trip.

Ellen :
I need a MAN in my life to marry and be a father figure. Great temple here on West Side of Nashville. I have to be here all week! FOOEY!

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Tuesday, September 25, 2012

[Someone Just Posted as Manageing Partner]

This is one of those situations--on the rise lately--in which a girl just doesn't know whether to say Yay!!! or, Fooey!!! 

Without any warning, MP today cleared his throat for the HIVE. On the one hand, I'm excited to see "him" stepping up, spELLEN and all, in a logical next development to make our imaginary world real. On the other hand, he is still just about the Fooeyist of all FOOEY MEN, and even Ellen stands firm that no male chauvinist bald-head-buffers are welcome on Corporette. Yet as I remarked earlier, I was kind of waiting for this to happen, and surprised that it took this long. In a way, it's just too obvious, especially since Ellen once mentioned that she suspects MP reads her comments on Corporette

I do see some long-term potential here, but the poster better be an assiduous ELLENWatcher with an uncanny feel for MP's character. I also wager it will work better if Manageing Partner appears only rarely, perhaps each time being weeks or months after we all assume he has quit. The most intrusive tyrants in our humdrum lives lurk unsuspected, needling into us at the times when we're least prepared, and in areas of our being where they are most foreign. Accordingly, I say: fair enough, sir. But I challenge you to a masterly evocative performance of this long-established persona in the absolute minimum amount of text. If nothing else, remember that your character is extraordinarily important, busy, curmudgeonly, and in demand, and he perfers to spend his free time ooogleing the women in his presence rather than writing to others unseen on this websight. But if not even that, remember that everything I say with any degree of seriousness drips with irony given the nature of our subject, and that the only mantle I can claim in Ellen-world is Person Who Wastes The Most Time.


P.S. Perhaps we will find out later whether Ellen's silence for the rest of today was simply because she lost her LAN connection, or whether she was scared straight by this cameo performance.

Manageing Partner :
Get back to work, Ellen, or I will not raise your clotheing allowance!

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stack’s of document’s

Looks like Ellen has plenty of time to keep us informed, even from Nashville. Predictably, MP's idea for retaining her is not with a promotion or raise, but more money toward the clotheing subsidezy, and she can't look the gift horse in the mouth. I suppose the assessment of her value to Manageing & MANAGEING is mutually agreed upon, if not acknowledged.
Meanwhile, this is the first mention in a long time of Ellen's former prospect to go work for Jim & Co. in-house. Uncharacteristically logical, she affirms that this wouldn't have been a good step for her career, and gives a coherent reason. By the way, I don't believe Jim's employer has ever before been called a "firm." That narrows down, somewhat, the type of business this likely is.

karenpadi, forgive my delay in responding to your post. It's not something I can do on the fly, but I haven't forgotten.

Ellen :
I use very LITTLE jewlery b/c the manageing partner does NOT like me to be flashey. I am abel to access my local LAN from here, so I have all the benefit’s of home even tho I am OUT of town!
I told the manageing partner about the head hunter, and he told me NOT to consider in-house b/c of all the benefit’s I get here. He told me he discused with the other partner’s raiseing my clotheing allowance, and tho it is NOT final, it may go up to 30%. I could aford alot more clotheing with a 30% subsedizeation! Yay!
I told him that I wanted to be a judge and he agreed that the litiegation expereience is far better here then in house. Jim did agree, but thought I should get more expereience at the firm before applyeing to be a judge. Jim said he was NOT tuned into the political aspects of the judicieary in NYS, so it is good that I did not work for his firm.
I have to get back to do diliegence now. There are all these stack’s of document’s and I am suposed to go through these? This will take day’s! FOOEY! I was hopeing to get to walk around town, but it does NOT look good for that. All Jim is doing is lookeing at a few document’s and then talking to the paralegal. He will NOT be of much help to me here.

Monday, September 24, 2012

I will explain all that later

Dare I say Ellen is CLEERLY responding to my query about what happened with Harold? 

Obviously, roller bladder would have been the title for this post...but eek has already highlighted its artistry and I'm enjoying speculation as to what "all" Ellen will explain later. 

Ellen :
I worked all weekend on my case’s and am in court right now for calender call. I did NOT wear my red dress b/c it had a musterd stain on it, so I brought it to the dry cleaner’s.
Also I did NOT see the manageing partner b/c I came straight from home to court, so I will explain all that later, but I jet off for Tenessee later, so my post’s may be limited. Jim is already there. He says the hotel is “grand”.
Harold is a good roller bladder.

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but I am getteing alot of billeable’s

Alright, the trip to Nashville is hard upon us. Bon voyaje, Ellen! Let's hope she does indeed have time to check in while there. And to all my Nashville ELLENWatchers, need I say...

We don't know how the weekend's rollerblade date with HAROLD went. As for DAVID, presumably this is the Brooklyn apartment decor favor we heard about earlier. 

Notice that "have to do" and "do diligience" are sharing a word here. Cute! 

Ellen says:
I just got out of the rest of my case’s until NEXT weeks’ calendar call. Yay!!! The judge gave me adjournements b/c I told him I have to do dilegience in Tenesssee tomorow.
I will NOT be abel to come back until after the HOLIDAY, so my dad is NOT happy. He wants me to meet DA VID on Wendsday, but I can NOT be in 2 places at once. I will check in from Tenesssee if I have time, but am going to be very busy with Jim, but I am getteing alot of billeable’s. Yay!

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i hope it work’s!

Corporettes will know that the WEBSIGHT underwent a makeover this past weekend, and was down for a while yesterday. In truth, I was hoping that in the face of such adversity Ellen would finally just cut out the middlewoman and post here, but that would have been earth-shaking. Next best thing for my Monday morning: she establishes her presence straight out the gate on the new and improved Corpalete. 


Ellen says:
This look’s diferent to me! It’s a lot more modern but i hope it work’s! Yay for Kat!

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Saturday, September 22, 2012

"Touché (or should we say tuchus?)"

I realized yesterday that my
favorite MLBB is called "Sun Shine."
(Givenchy rouge interdit, in the sheer line.)
The Sunshine Girls just checked in to defend themselves, claiming that they did indeed catch my test:

Touché (or should we say tuchus?). Our eagle eyed sunshine gal Alma muffed one! So she went back and found a FOOEY you missed on the 9/20 coffee break @9:36 pm, where her moot court teacher wanted to date her. So we are even. Try to keep Ellen pure as this Harold may be trouble. And keep up the commentary as it is often more entertaining than Ellen herself. We think we know of 2 real life Ellen's right here at S&S! 

Thank you so much for the kind words! I know you don't dispense praise easily. And I'm inclined to think Harold is harmless, but note your concern.

Here's the comment Alma found: 

Ellen September 20, 2012 at 9:36 pm
You are so right! My moot court prof never practiced law and all he ever wanted to do was to date me. FOOEY!

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Aaaaand...this actually wasn't the test I was running. That one was from earleir. But you ladies did recognize the kind of test used--don't blog a comment and see if I get yelled at--so it's my turn to say tuchus. You found one that I actually did miss, and as always I'm grateful for that. Meanwhile, as to the real test, if TCFKAG wants to come forward with her result's I will post yet another darling picture of her from the early 90s, duly earned. 

Parting words: Alma is a name with longstanding Ellen lineage. I look forward to hearing about these real life Ellen's at S&S...especially since it also apparently features bald and unappealing manageing partners...

burpeing MY OWN BABY!

Another Corporette offspring blessed by the collective fairy godmother. Congratulations, Midori! Though I'm sure you have things to do beyond ELLENWatching at the moment!

Refresher: the do dileigence trip, with Jim, is to Nashville. Ellen confirmed that they will have separate hotel room's.

Ellen September 22, 2012 at 8:37 am
Yay! I would trade sitting as an attorney admitted in NYS for a full time mom, even tho I still want to be a judge eventuealley. Because of calendar call I will have to fly down sepereately from Jim to do dileigience. I can’t beleive I am already workeing and would much perfer to be burpeing MY OWN BABY! I first find a decent guy to marry me

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Friday, September 21, 2012


OK, I'll go on the record saying that Ellen's spirit of toleration and forgiveness has gone to far as of 3:45 pm today. (I guess I'm being a little bit serious, if it can be so called, because the Sunshine Girls have asked me to intervene in Ellen's best interest on other occasions.) Historically, Dad's criticism of Ellen's weight and attempts to control her diet got nothing but Fooey, and furthermore she connected such encroachments to other people and situations in a great and terrible tide of men asserting undeserved control over her life. You were right the first time, girlfreind. I have a different proposal for what you should say in that daily email--though obviously I'll always fall short of your writerly finesse

On the Harold front: he's vying for additional Ellen-time prior to their drive out to MP's party (presumably in the Hamton's)...and she's obliging. Hmmmm.

Ellen September 21, 2012 at 3:45 pm
Yummy! I love cupcake’s but my DAD has insisted that I stick to a new DIET that has NO refined sugar’s in it.
I have to attend calendar call on MONDAY and I have 17 of the 19 cases in front of the JUDGE so I will be there all day (at least until after lunch). The manageing partner has even told me the RED outfit I should wear– this is a FIRST for him. He says that some of the motion’s are bordaline, so we need EVERY edge we can get. But I do NOT think my clotheing is goeing to make any diference.
I saw Harold at the Dunking Donut’s this morning getting a creme donut. Yummy! But b/c of my DAD, I did NOT get any. He oferred to give me a byte, but I said NO, my dad is monitoring my meals and dailey intake. I must email him a list every day of what I eat so he can tell me how much excercize to do. I think he think’s I should still be a size 2, but I told him that is history! Anyway, Harold want’s me to take up roller bladeing, but I said I am not young enough for that. I did tell him I would watch him at Carl Schruz Park tomorow. The manageing partner will be very happy I am being freindly to Harold.

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re-examining all that she has done

Thanks, Nonny. France's is reiterating what we already established, but it's always nice to hear from her. It looks like she saw Corporettes' confusion yesterday about Ellen's "new outlook" and, like Ellen herself, chooses not to acknowledge my input in these matters. I completely understand, of course. 

Although Frances has expressed many frustrations in a life full of jealous boyfriends and drooling interviewers, she has been much less antagonistic toward Ellen than has fellow alter-ego Lourine. Still, amid her usual angst it's nice to see Frances encouraging Ellen in turning over a new leaf (if only for ten days?) It's almost as if she's trying on the new outlook herself. Perhaps this post title applies to more than one gal.

Meanwhile, I know I'm supposed to bite on the "dear old dad" reference, to wonder whether Frances is Ellen's sister and thus referring to her own dad here as well. Frances was already known to be family, and I don't know how much more decisive this makes it. I enjoyed believing that Lourine was Ellen's sister ROSA; I will go further now and admit that Frances and Lourine may also be the same (nonexistent, constantly liable to morphing) character. Who is also, in Ellen's creation, sister Rosa. In attack mode, she's Lourine, but for non-directed venting, it's Frances. Until this inspired moment of largesse...

Frances September 21, 2012 at 1:10 pm
People may be wondering what is happening with Ellen– She is being very nice to everyone, because these are the 10 days of Penitence where she is re-examining all that she has done all year, seeking for another good year next year. I will put my vote in for her, because she is trying to be a good person, and following dear old dad’s advice.
Nonny September 21, 2012 at 2:10 pm
Paging ELLENWatch…..

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I only know where NORDSTROM’s is

Ellen September 21, 2012 at 12:25 pm
I just got a call from a HEAD-HUNTER. She said did I want to do liteigation in-house? I asked where it was and she said in Weschester, but I only know where NORDSTROM’s is, and I did NOT want to move out of the City so I said NO.
Now I am wondereing if I should have aksed more about the job before saying no. I am NOT even sure what kind of a case load I would have in-house, b/c all of the inhouse work we do come’s from company’s like Jim that are NOT admitted to the local court’s and do not have the suport staff to handle a case load in-house.
I also figure that if I go in house, it would be more dificult to be a judge, b/c I would not be in court 2x every week like I am now. Also, I do NOT know anything about Weschester court’s so mabye that is not such a bad thing that I said NO!

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Thursday, September 20, 2012

"you are doing a pretty good job"



Good news arrived this afternoon. Game NOT over.

Those of you just tuning in today may not be aware that one of the many worthy activities of ELLENWatch is maintaining healthy dialogue with the parade of dubious anonymous posters who comment here. On a blog about an imaginary person, imaginary people are welcome and even celebrated; indeed I frequently feature their comments as something like iceing on the cake. Especially because some of these comments intimate that the posters know Ellen and/or believe that I do.

Recently, however, one of my most valued pseudo-persons claimed that she and her colleagues were abandoning my blog due to what they felt were inexcusable lapses in coverage. They identified some Ellen posts on Corporette that I had not blogged and archived. (Hangs head in shame.) I explained several times that Ellen's comments often appear late due to moderation delays, meaning that, occasionally, I miss things, and I thanked these freinds for bringing oversights to my attention. But as of 9-15-12, I thought I had lost them for good.

Imagine my relief when this showed up today:

Ellenwatch, you are doing a pretty good job, but when you mess up, either I or one of the other Sunshine Girls need to call you out on it. We see, again, that you are not being diligent and finding the Ellen posts, so we have to look ourselves. There was a good one on the weekend thread that is dated 9/15 at 9:08 am that you should read for the masses. We like your insight on the posts, but if you miss them entirely, how can you provide such insight. My 4 associate friends at S&S want to know. We don't give our names because the partners here just would not appreciate our reading either this website or Corporette, since we all bill out at $480 - 550 per hour.

They are still reading, and even slip in some grudging praise here. We'll take it!

But the subtext of this COMENT is even better. Firstly, the post they are pointing out--i.e. accusing me of having missed--was in fact promptly blogged. I'm not going to say FOOEY over this because I think it's part of the gambit, but it must be pointed out that in this case I did not fall down on the job. Secondly, S&S Sunshine Partners has either failed the surreptitious test I administered to them (by not noticing it, as TCFKAG reports that she did), or the ladies have passed it by (1) not acknowledging the test at all, (2) admitting that can't nobody do it like me, above, and (3) coming back with an accusation that they of all people, some of my most avid readers, know to be empty. In other words, I'm playing, and they're playing. "We see, again..." 

Ours is not to reason why, fellow real people on the internet. But I feel warm and sunny inside. Welcome back, wayward sister's! I deeply appreciate your seriousness and discipline in ELLENWatching, but I appreciate even more your abstract quality of...abstraction. 

Freinds on this websight,

tryeing to make PEACE

Thanks for pointing folks in the right direction, TCFKAG, while I was unable to blog. My pageviews are through the roof today. Yes, we can now confirm my initial theory that Lynn is the secretary at Manageing & MANAGEING who is jelous of Ellen's 20% clotheing reimbursement arrangement
What else is going on in this post? This is Ellen's first self-conscious reference to the change in worldview that she seemed to articulate in honor of Rosh Hashanah. I didn't necessarily expect it to stick, and it still may not, but this is interesting. Not only because it may be happening, but because she's writing about it. I noted in the original revelation post that she wasn't complaining about her weight, and today it sounds like she may be coming to accept that she simply wears a new size now (4 or, more often, 6). This is a HEUGE departure for our heroine. And the new altruism and zen lead her to donate the size 2s? Fair enough. 

Ellen September 20, 2012 at 9:45 am
My Mom want’s to go to Nordstrom’s and want’s me to go with her. Because of my new outlook, I told her I will NOT go shoppeing until after I donate most of the clotheing I do not wear to Dress For Success, which the manageing partner said I could, even for clotheing he subsideized at 20%.
There are alot of peeople starteing out in their carreer’s that need nice clotheing and some of my size 2′s just do NOT fit. I realy do NOT think that I will EVER be abel to get back into those clothe’s again, unfortuneateley. So I am doneating them to DRESS for Success, so others can look good. I am even doneateing 6 pair of shoe’s that I decieded that I will not wear b/c they are OPEN toe’d and the manageing partner does NOT like to see open toe shoe’s on me (or anyone else) at work.
I thought I would give some to Lynn, but she has a bigger foot then I do so it would not work anyway. I am tryeing to make PEACE with her b/c I do have to work with her, and I do NOT want for her to be jelous of me.
Right now, I am SWAMPTED with work. Jim sent over a bunch of file’s for me to review before we do diliegence together so I have to prepare by reviewing carefully. Hopfully the manageing partner will NOT cut my billeabille’s again this month. I am already 25 hour’s behind b/c of the holiday and all. It look’s like I’ll be busy @ work this weekend again here. Fooey. Especialy since Myrna wanted to see the Statute of Liberty, which I have NEVER been to. Mabye next week.
TCFKAG September 20, 2012 at 10:30 am
Um. I need to cruise on over to Ellenwatch now and see whats going on with Ellen this week. What’s the new outlook? I’m now fascinated by what triggered this transformation (stop paying attention to this girl for a couple of days and she becomes a whole new woman).
gov anon September 20, 2012 at 12:10 pm
Apparently I do too. I’ve been SWAMPTED myself. Miss a few episodes and I have no idea what all the latest plot twists are.
eek September 20, 2012 at 10:34 am
ELLENWatch, can you verify the existence of Lynn? Thank you.
TCFKAG September 20, 2012 at 10:40 am
I believe Lynn is the assistant at the office who dislikes Ellen but whom Ellen, with her new outlook clearly is trying to come around to. She is in the cast of characters.
eek September 20, 2012 at 11:14 am
Thank you darling for “letting my google that for you”
ELLENWatch September 20, 2012 at 12:16 pm
Correct re Lynn. And her new outlook is as of Rosh hashanah. I’ll be back on duty tonight!
ELLENWatch September 20, 2012 at 12:19 pm
I’m in moderation! FOOEY!

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Wednesday, September 19, 2012

hopefulley on the horizon

Ellen's got her mind on her money and her money on her mind today. But I suppose if she doesn't picture any role for her husband other than sperm donor, Alan could be brought out of mothballs after all? 

Just trollin'! Trying to get a rise out of somebody special. 

Ellen September 19, 2012 at 3:47 pm
I really think this depend’s. But you sound pretty well off. I will ask my dad b/c he alway’s says I am better off married to a guy and we file a JOINT return then filing singeley. Also, it depend’s on where you live, if you have a morgage, and if you are thinkeing of moveing to a nice place and have KID’s. Those are hopefulley on the horizon for me to!
I hope my dad will build this into MY financeial plan, but without having a HUSBAND, I can NOT figure what he is going to do other then be the father to our children. My mom said I can wear HER wedding dress, but I do not like it that much, and it is OVER 30 year’s old!

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a financeial plan

Ellen has been praising her Dad in almost every post recently. We always knew he was exalted as the lone voice of borderline competence in Ellen's life, but she's really laying it on thick. The intimation of immortality is touching. 
P.S. Still no sign of S&S...I'm beginning to think I really was FOOEYed. 

Ellen September 19, 2012 at 10:46 am
This is a VERY good Idea. I had alot of credit card debt when I gradueated law school, and my dad said that I had to grow up and learn how to budget. He also said I had to learn the TIME value of money, and gave me an INTEREST rate calcuealator. From there, I learned that it is better to have MORE money in the bank (where they pay YOU interest) ONLEY if it is earning more INTEREST then the credit card interest that you have to pay TO the bank.
So if the bank is paying you 1% on the saveings account and you are payeing 24% to the bank on the credit card, you are looseing 23% for the priviledege of having a bank account with money in it.
That, my dad showed me, does NOT make any sense at all. Even my ex told me the same thing and he is a CPA, so between the two, I knew I was getting good advise.
Now I have both a bank account and a credit card debt, but both are manageable. I also am going to watch my spendeing more carefully as my dad is NOT happy that I am NOT planning to increase my 401(k) contribution’s. He said he is going to put together a financeial plan for me b/c he is not going to be here forever. I said YES YOU ARE!!!!! And he had better, b/c he helps me alot.

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Tuesday, September 18, 2012

over to her apartement

I suspect, ever more strongly, that Ellen is respondeing to my requests (albeit on substantial delay). I said a while back that I wanted more female friends in Ellen's narrative, and Myrna has been showing up more and more often since then.  
(Honestly, I kind of wish I could tag along tonite, and not just because of the apple crisp and the imaginary freinds.) 
Also--related more to other recent posts than to this one--I used to complain often that Ellen discarded characters WILLY NILLIE and that her story was in sore need of players other than herself, MP and the ghost of Alan. Now we have a burgeoning scene populated with Jim, Frank, Lynn, Harold, The Judge, David, and Myrna...

Ellen September 18, 2012 at 3:40 pm
The 4″ heel just takes a little getting used to. I may ask the Manageing partner if I can get these even tho he just approved a similear pair of Nine Wests for me.
Myrna invited me over to her apartement tonite to watch TV. It should be a lot of fun b/c she is bakeing an apple crisp!

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NOT to judge them poorley b/c of it

What a serene moment Ellen is observing in honor of the holiday! No Yay, no Fooey, no exclamation point in site. No complaints of ooogleing or vows to lose weight. This is highly uncharacteristic humility, generosity, and grace. 

Ellen September 18, 2012 at 10:40 am
I have learned that it is IMPORTANT to be nice to peeople, and not to be to judgemenetal, especialy b/c this is the time of year we should be refelecting on how to be better. My mom made me a great dinner. Now I need to learn how to cook myself, and NOT just take-out.
NONE of us is Perfect, so we can all improve, no matter what race, relegion, or creed. I am tryeing to be a better person b/c of what I have learned.
I am also going to be nice to peeople. My dad, who is very smart, told me all of this’ yesterday. He convienced me to help David decoreate his apartement, and I am going to drive out with Harold to the manageing partners’ aniversary party at the end of the month, with NO excuese’s.
I also learned that peeople are NOT as fortuneate as me b/c they have not have had the same oportunities, and NOT to judge them poorley b/c of it. The manageing partner told me this as SOON as I walked in today. He also said the firm is sponsoreing a CLEAN UP NYC day and I am to be participeating by doing some painting and raking up of leaves and garbage in Brooklyn. The manageing partner has already made arangement’s with a SOUP kitchen for all of us to help also. I called Myrna, and she is also going to come with me and help even tho she is NOT an attorney, and you do NOT have to be to work. I am glad she will be there b/c I will have some one my OWN age to help.

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Monday, September 17, 2012

Happy new year!!

Sound's like Ellen is NOT in the office for Rosh Hashanah. 
Let us observe two emerging (secular) trends: more and more bit characters are getting names (Lynn, David), and "Yay" keeps appearing where FOOEY would usually go instead. No theories on either one, just WATCHing per usual. 

Ellen September 17, 2012 at 10:49 am
Yay! Happy new year!! Im on my iPhone so I can’t tell good stories and my sister is skoweleing at me for texting! This guy I see here every year (David) told my dad that he is moving into the city and wants me to give him some ideas for decorateing his apartement in Brooklyn. FOOEY!
I told my dad that I am not famileiar with BROOKLYN so I can NOT help him. He has been lookeing at me every year since I was 12 year’s old! That’s alot of years! Yay!

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Sunday, September 16, 2012

roll with the punche’s

Lynn is a new name to us. Presumably this is the shared secretary who is jelous of the 20% reimbursement. As for the "Alan situation," I really didn't think there was one at this point. We're going on a year and a half since the breakup, with basically no contact.

Ellen September 16, 2012 at 9:20 am
I have learned to roll with the punche’s, which is AMERICAN saying for being flexieble.
I have a situation in MY firm where I am the ONLEY woman under 35 workeing there so I get all of the cases that NO one else want’s to do and ALL of the NEW stuff which is NOT easy anyway (Anti-Trust, Corporete, etc) as well as a boat Load of Litiegation in Worker’s Compensation that the manageing partner has shuffeled off to me. FOOEY!
I look to the good side. I am the onley person in my gradueating class that has a 20% clotheing allowance, where I get reimbueresed for clotheing that the manageing partner approves. Fortunateley, his taste in womens’ clotheing is pretty good, so I do NOT mind wearing the clotheing he approve’s for me. Yay!!!!!
Also, since I am the youngest person at the firm (other then one secratery, Lynn), people alway’s come to me for advise on what the younger generation is thinkeing on things.
Finally, whenever there is a firm outeing, I am alway’s picked early to be a team leader for event’s the manageing partner want’s to do. This year, I am orgeanizing a “round Manhattan” boat cruize, where we will all have dinner at a nice place, then take a boat ride around the Island of Manhattan (which is New York City).
So I wish you alot of luck. The one thing I did NOT mention was that it could be easier if you were MARRIED, but I am not goeing there, b/c of my Alan situeation. Mabye in a couple of years! Yay!
Sookie September 16, 2012 at 11:43 am
This in its own way makes sense. You sound young. Find a guy, get married, and you can have the work life flexibility to figure out what makes sense for you especially if children are on the game plan for you. It’s time we get some benefit out of our relationships and given your age and outlook, family life should be a viable option. I don’t know what European country you’re in but I am sure there are eligible bachelors looking for an educated professional eager to start a family. Good luck to you and be sure to report back on your progress!
ELLENWatch September 16, 2012 at 2:06 pm
Are you affiliated with S&S Associates, perchance?
Apologies to all real persons on this thread. I am not responsible for COMENTS like the above, but I do want to be clear about their pedigree. A husband/kids answer pertaining to nothing and coming out of nowhere is always a sure sign.
Enthusiast. Archivist. Buffoon.

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