made him keep his SOCK’s on

Kirstie is back with another tip from Bitter Lawyer. Ellen comments, below, on a faux CEASE AND DESIST DEMAND (caps in original, really!) about mandals. 

On Corporette, we haven't heard Alan's name mentioned in a while now. Granted, this post (like the other one from Kirstie) is going up out of chronological order, but I will re-assign it later. Readers have been encouraging Ellen to forget about Alan, and until recently I assumed she simply couldn't--but maybe the tide is finally turning. We know it isn't Jim helping her to move on, though--perhaps unsatisfactory bedroom memories are giving her the final push? After over a year?

For the record, Ellen had never shared with us before that Alan was a disappointing lover. If so, given his nearly constant drunkenness, as indicated here, it should not be a surprise. At the same time, I've been around long enough to suspect this might be a case of sour grapes. Remember that Ellen's chief regret about Alan was that they were intimate without being married, or even engaged. I got the impression that her deep feelings and attraction toward him--mutually strengthening--were what swept her up in the fantasy of spending the rest of her life with him, and led her to put up with his mistreatment and drinking for as long as she did. If she's choosing to mis-remember their passion now, perhaps it's a mode of coping, sort of like reporting that Alan has a fat neck to go with his fat head. How could such an unattractive, sweaty/smelly guy, who was lame in bed and aimless in life, have broken Ellen's heart so thoroughly? Any other reads on this? 

Special to Kirstie: If you keep coming back, I promise to keep your photos flattering! Feel free to invite others on BITTER LAWYER to join us here as well! I already have evidence that male ELLENWatchers are not deterred by my poppy-pattern background theme or rainbow avatar. 

Ellen May 2, 2012 at 3:45 pm

I agree with this LF10.

We should NOT have to put up with smelly feet on men. I dated Alan, and he NEVER cliped his toe’s and his nails were smelly and DIRTY! FOOEY.

I made him keep his SOCK’s on when he shared my bed b/c I did NOT want to get scratched by him.

He was horible in bed with or withut his sock’s on b/c of the alchohol effect. FOOEY!

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