Thursday, December 19, 2013

sacraficeing by haveing to marry some SCHLUB

From a humanitarian perspective, this is a huge relief: Grandma Leyeh's promise to give Ellen $50k if she was married and pregnant by October 2014 has lost its condition and turned into a regular gift. Indeed, we no longer need to worry about marrying a pet food peddler or sleeping with cooties. From a narrative angle, however, this is a big letdown. Where's the tension/suspense now? Ellen is still a desperate spinster hiding behind her professional successes in an attempt to compensate for failing at womanhood--but all that was already true! There's no time frame on anything anymore. Emptiness today, emptiness tomorrow, emptiness forever.

I'm actually a bit skeptical about Leyeh's line of thinking here. Why the sudden concern for Ellen's happiness and wellbeing? I suspect what actually changed was her sense of the realistic. It's also possibel that, upon realizing just how low Ellen would have to lower her standards for marriage, Leyeh decided it would be less of a disgrace to see her die single than to bring, say, Fred into the family.  

Yay! I hope you alway’s have the same sucess. I was VERY nervous when I did my first presentation in front of the firms’ MANAGEMENT COMMITTEE. The Manageing partner wanted me to be good, but I was NOT a big speaker. So with alot of coaching, I did fairley well. They decided I would be OK as their WC Litiegator and now I am a PARTNER as of 1/1/14. Grandma Leyeh is so happy she said to just forget about the $50K for the marrage and child, and said now she is giveing me this even if I never get married or bear a child. Wow, b/c the onley guys that I would consider as a husband just want to have sex with me, and the one’s that would marry me I do NOT want to have sex with. Isn’t that what a HOPSKIN’s Choice is all about? The storey of my life!!! FOOEY!
But it seem’s to be workeing out. I will get the $50K next year, irregardless of wether I am MARRIED and haveing a baby on time, tho Grandma Leyeh says she still want’s this for me but she does NOT want to have to have me sacraficeing by haveing to marry some SCHLUB and then makeing him have sex enough time’s with me to get me PREGGER’s!!!
The thought of marrying some sweaty smelly SCHLUB just to have him impregeanate me is GROSS! BUT Now I don’t have to. YAY!!!!!

1 comment:

  1. I somehow missed this. I'm very happy for Ellen. I personally think the young-married Rosa might be really unhappy a decade or two hence (although with a good cruise wardrobe). Why should Ellen have to suffer the same fate?