The coment about how you can't threadjack an open thread I have seen before. Witty as always!
Yay! Open Thread’s! I love open thread’s! There can, by definition, be NO Threadjack’s!
I am waiteing for Myrna to come over with her exercycle. She is loaning it to me b/c I told the manageing partner I needed alot of new clothe’s b/c of my tuchus, and he gave me a chalenge. He said if I could loose 5 pound’s by January 1 (technicaly Jan 2, b/c I am home Jan 1), he will give me $500 as a bonus OVER AND ABOVE my clotheing alowance! YAY!
I was worried that I could not loose 5 pound’s, but Myrna will be my trainor, and she is bringeing over her exercycle for me to use in front of my TV. She said that b/c I sit at home all the time watching TV, I can use her exercycle to watch tv and exercize at the same time. Also, she thinks that it COULD help my tuchus, but she did NOT hold out alot of hope b/c she said she does NOT beleive in SPOT reduceing.
She also is takeing me running in Central Park! FOOEY. I do NOT like to run, and have to get running shoe’s that the manageing partner will NOT 30% reimbeurse for b/c they are NOT to be worn in the office. FOOEY!
I have 12 day’s to loose 5 pound’s! I can do it MYRNA says! Yay!!!!
Thank goodness Ellen's hoo-ha is Intact! Now you. MUST encourage her to shrink that tookus! Claire Danes is slim, so should our Ellen. Yay!
ReplyDeleteStay tuned for her pound-by-pound updates. Ellen is so irresistible to men at any weight, however, that I don't think there's much cause for worry.
DeleteYou've mentioned these interested male colleagues before. Do they read this blog, by any chance? What actions have they taken to find Ellen?
ReplyDeleteYes, these pigs are avid followers of your site. They are fixated on locating Ellen, but do not have any clues beyond what you have given them. They know she works somewhere around Penn Station and that she lives somewhere in the East 70's uptown. They keep thinking that she must take the 4, 5 or 6 to work, and have even gotten to the point that they were going to rotate staking out the 33rd and 77th street stops on the 6, but abandoned that idea because of the unpredictable nature of Ellen's comings and goings. They bemoan the fact that she does not give out any advance specifics or they'd otherwise be on to her like a hunter to its prey. What gets us so ticked off about their attitudes is that while Ellen (and the rest of us) want to find worthy guys to date and marry, these men (who might otherwise seem eligible at a distance), think only of "stuffing her stocking" and discarding her like the other paralegals at the firm, after they have dropped their loads. Why can't eligible women like us find guys who want to do more than pump and dump? For some sick reason, these guys think that you, ELLENWatch, "will lead them to the promised land", meaning Ellen! We do not want to give any one of them the satisfaction, because no matter how saavy Ellen may be, she still can fall prey to losers like these who will do little more than deceive Ellen into having sex with them and then dump her after chalking up another notch on their (miniature) peckers. If you do discover exactly where she lives or works, do not disclose it on this blog, because these guys will be there faster than a pig in slop. They are that smitten with her, her blond look, her smarts and even her slightly large tuchis. 3 of the guys have specifically commented to us that they "would tap us if we had a tuchis like Ellen". Can you imagine the nerve of these guys, who are all over 30 years old? How immature is that? Tap us? What are we, kegs of beer? What do they think we are getting out of it? We have absolutely no desire to be "tapped" by any man, unless we were married to them. Please keep this in mind as you pursue your otherwise excellent resource on all things Barshefsky.
ReplyDeleteWait...clothing allowances and a $500 bonus to lose weight? Is this legal?
ReplyDeleteBUTT I LOVE IT.