Wednesday, January 22, 2014

in my freezer inside a box of brocolii

Genius plan; no surprise coming from a genius. This emergency fund has been depreciating for years, the broccoli's sell-by date was in 1999, and no doubt Ellen would have a more graceful tuchus if she'd eaten it rather than CRUMB'S. 

I keep calm by just calling my dad and askeing him to put money in my account. It realy is not hard. YAY!!!!
As for the emergency fund, I ALWAYS keep $500 in my freezer inside a box of brocolii. No one eat’s brocolii, so that box has been siting there EMPTY execept for the $500 goeing back to my college day’s. Fortuneately, I do NOT have to acess it, so I keep it inside a GLAD BAG–otherwise it would get all wet and mushey. FOOEY!
Frank saw my coat and he swear’s there is POOPIE in the fur of the coat, but NOT to worry, b/c when the animal (mink or raccoon was alive, it had to poop anyway). Frank told me his wife take’s her coat’s to the cleaner’s so I will have my house keeper do that on a weekend when I do NOT need to wear it. Right now, it is to cold NOT to wear the coat, poopie and all. DOUBEL FOOEY!


  1. Kudos to Ellen for hiding money where no one would find it (until now, that is). There must be hundreds of Corporettes reading this in NY City, and I will bet more than a few know her personally, not to mention her housekeeper, the other hired help at her condo and others she works with. So if she's really smart, now that she's spilled the brocolli, she should find a new hiding place for her emergency fund or we'll be hearing a sorry tale about losing that money.

    1. I'm also surprised that Alan never found/spent it back when he had full access to her fridge. Maybe Dad will confiscate and invest it to minimize any further risk.

  2. Not the sharpest, but likely gorgeous.