Friday, November 2, 2012

[Sunshine Girls Step Up Their Demand's]

Oh man. In a development I probably should have foreseen, S&S Associates have brought their concerns to Corporette. Apparently asking me to exert influence over the events in Ellen's life wasn't proving pointless enough for them; they feel it's time to start calling on Kat now. First of all, I hope nobody is too bothered by this. I actually created ELLENWatch to keep as much of this as possible off of Corporette...and instead these spinoff characters, to my knowledge created only by the existence of my blog, have stormed the gates and effectively led to more Ellen rather than less. Thank's to TC for maintaining Sunshine-appropriate spelling errors in her prompt response, and to January for keeping the Roberta flame alive.

On to the meat of this sandwich (again, I'm vegetarian). It's true that I've been quite cavalier about Ellen's sexual decisions over here, mostly because I'm a major proponent of real people deciding whatever they want to decide. Yes, the virginity ship sailed years ago. We're certain that Alan made it, and we're not certain he was the first. Ellen has a redemptive attitude about bed romps that she regrets, and in that respect if no other Corporettes overwhelmingly agree with her. I'm a little confused to see the Sunshine Girls speaking as if Ellen has no sexual experience, when they have acknowledged her history with Alan in comment's here more than once.

Moreover, S&S Associates, it's very clear that you yourselves are a group of highly intelligent and successful women doing important things and interacting with key people. If you arrived in this manner after a couple of youthful indiscretions--even if you've since thrown away the residual "baubles"--then surely you can fathom the possibility that Ellen prevails as well. And though David may be horny, he's not married. Still I say: have fun, kids, and be safe. 

NB: The "fellow alumna" comment may be a nod to my fond imagineering that Kat and Ellen knew each other in law school. I can't think of any other intended meaning (so, thanks?). But again: Kat went to Georgetown, and Ellen went to George Washington. The best we can now dream is that they exchanged compliments on hair accessories on the Metro sometime in the early aughts.

Sunshine Girls :
We at S&S are worried about whether David will take sexual liberties with Ellen. We have asked Ellenwatch to intercede but we think she wants Ellen to lose her virginity with that guy. He isn’t right for her, even if circumcised. Kat can you step in for a fellow alumna and tell her to keep a dime between her knees around David? I assure you that is the best thing for Ellen at this stage in her career. We know because we were used by partners at our firm who professed undying love for us, bought us baubles and kept us on the side but NEVER left their wives for us even tho we did things for them in bed that their wives would NEVER do. Stop Ellen from falling into the same rabbit hole we did. Please!
  • TCFKAG :
    You really think Ellen is a virgin? I mean she was with Allen for quite awhile.
    • January :
      +1. I’m fairly certain EllenWatch has already covered this. And seriously, ladies, I’d be more worried about Roberta if I were you….


Read more: http://corporette.com/2012/11/01/nordstroms-half-yearly-sale-kats-picks/#ixzz2B4ID7xVD


Meanwhile I got this comment on my blog, at almost exactly the same time:

We at S&S are worried about David. You should not encourage this. He gave her wine, went bed shopping with her and said he would only sample it with her) and told her he likes her ass. He's done about everything short of piping her. You must stop this before he worms his way between her thighs because he's sure to dump her once he's humped her. And his roomie Adam surely has porked Myrna, whose morals are also suspect. We think she'd spread faster than hot peanut butter on a bagel for any guy with a job. Please do whatever you can to preserve Ellen's hymen. She deserves a successful guy who loves her not some Web Wonk who just wants to use her for sex for a month or two then disappear. We know. We've been there. 

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